


Hearts Astray

by rndmnwierd



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Human, F/F, there's sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-28
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-06-17 18:54:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 40,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15467811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rndmnwierd/pseuds/rndmnwierd
Summary: Lapis Lazuli. Peridot Diamond. Two girls, both as different as can be; rivals in school, trading barbs and snark all day long. Is everything really as it seems? It's their senior year of high school and the last time either will ever legally be considered children. How much can change in just nine months time?





	1. Throats and Fangs

“Read it and weep, Lazuli.” Came a nasally voice, filled with smug satisfaction, just as a paper was slapped onto the desk in front of her. 

Lapis, leaning her head on her hand, elbow on her desk, raised an eyebrow with her usual lack of care. A huge “110%” was curled at the top of the paper with a “Good job!” written nearly underneath it. It was five percent more than the bonus question at the end had indicated was possible.

“Still continuing to try for teacher's pet, huh, Periwinkle?” She snarked lazily, trying not to let a smirk crawl across her lips.

“I'm simply pleased that I have won our little wager.” Peridot responded, pushing her glasses up her nose with a single finger, all five feet of her radiating confidence.

“Well, I'm gonna burst your bubble.” Lapis slid her own test across the desk, tilting her head to clear her electric blue shock of hair from her face. At the top, ‘115%’ in bright red ink, all the white space taken up by the teacher's comments on her bonus answer.

“Whaaat!” Peridot exclaimed and Lapis couldn't stop the way her lips turned up at the corners. What an exaggerator the little nerd was.

The paper was snatched off Lapis’s desk and flipped through frantically while she leaned back and watched. The first major history test of their senior year, a little over 6 weeks into the year, was also the first opportunity the two had to compete over academics. The stakes? Coming to cheer their rival on, with enthusiasm, at an upcoming club competition.

“I can't believe this! And you accused me of going for teacher's pet, you managed to tie his favorite subject into an essay about events that take place decades before!” Peridot raged, one hand tugging on wild blonde locks and the other waving the test around incredulously.

“What can I say? I was motivated.” Lapis said nonchalantly, as though she hadn't studied her ever loving ass off to pass. She'd even tricked the teacher's aide so she could get a look at the essay topic on the last page of the test. 

The wager never said they had to play fair.

“There's no way! This isn't fair!” Peridot cried, but it was more to rant than any actual thoughts of foul play. The test landed back on Lapis's desk with a forlorn slap. 

“All's fair in love and war, nerdlinger. Now, let's talk about the costume I'm gonna have you wear.” Lapis smirked as Peridot gave a final cry and marched back to her desk, three rows in front of Lapis.

She'd left her test, but Lapis decided it'd be funnier to let her stew and give it back later. She tucked both tests into her folder and went back to leaning on her desk, this time head tilted so she could surreptitiously watch the still fuming Peridot.

“Man, you really got her good.” Said a distinctive voice from beside her, “What was the wager this time?” Lapis looked at her neighbor, Amethyst, as she posed the question, amusement clear in her tone.

“Be the other's cheerleader at a competition.” Lapis said simply.

“That doesn't sound too bad.” Amethyst conceded in confusion.

“ _With_ embarrassing costuming and ample enthusiasm.” Lapis watched the understanding cross Amethyst's face.

“Haha! Damn, Lap, you just can't give each other a break, can you?”

Lapis let herself smirk a bit, “We have another one in art, too, which I'm sure I have in the bag. The loser of that one has to buy the winner lunch for a week. And not cafeteria lunch, actual restaurant lunch. And, like, bring it to school and present it to the other like royalty.” That last part had been her idea and she was very excited to have Peridot try on the jester hat she'd bought. The winner got a little crown so she'd thought it was appropriate.

Amethyst cracked up and Lapis rolled her eyes good naturedly as her cackling bellowed around the room. “You guys are so mean to each other. I don't know how you haven’t killed each other by now. Going on four years of torturing each other, I figured one of you would have given up or something.”

“I never lose.” Lapis boasted, even though _that_ was a blatant lie. The rivalry between her and Peridot was the stuff of legends. When your school only had four hundred students, it wasn't hard for word to get around about that kinda stuff. The competitions, pranks, bets, and punishments they'd put each other through over three plus years of knowing each other was common knowledge.

Everyone knew Peridot gave as good as she got.

Art was next period and the teacher had the terrible idea of putting the two next to each other. This was either an attempt to solve their differences or provide entertainment during a boring class. 

She passed back everyone's projects. Lapis had a watercolor of the ocean and Peridot had a disturbingly detailed fantasy monster that Lapis knew was from a table top game. Lapis frowned at her grade, 99.5%, the half point taken off because “We live on the beach. It's technically beautiful, but I see ten thousand of these scenes a year”.

Looking over at Peridot she could see the bright 100, but couldn't quite make out the notes. What she could see was the expression on Peridot's face; part horror, part shock, all fluster.

“Looks like you win this one, P-pod.” Lapis groaned, slumping over the desk. 

Peridot jerked up like she'd been zapped, hiding the paper face down in her notebook and closing it hard. “Y-Yes. I'll set up a menu of favored nutritional items I want for lunch next week.”

Lapis just raised an eyebrow, the nerd was acting suspicious. “What did she say about your piece?”

“Oh, uh, it was good. Gnarly. She enjoyed the detail around the mouth and eyes…” Peridot trailed off slowly.

“Anything else?” Lapis prompted after a moment.

A beat. “...No.”

Uh-huh, right, Peridot was a terrible liar. Whatever, there wasn't time to pry it out of her. Just a moment later, the teacher was calling the class to order and Lapis tried to ignore the brooding Peridot next to her.

They didn't sit near each other at lunch, so Lapis had nearly forgotten about her rival's mood until the last class of the day. Walking into the room, Lapis immediately noticed the blonde glaring out the window with all her notes still closed. That was the biggest giveaway that something was bothering her; Peridot took notes like it was a religion.

Lapis marched over with an aggravated sigh and slammed her hand on Peridot's desk, making her jump nearly out of her chair.

“What the heck, Lazuli!” Peridot’s face turned red from mixed fury and embarrassment.

“Brooding is my job, asshole.” Lapis huffed, “Stop it already or I'm gonna have to start sharing my eyeliner with you.”

Peridot looked at her like she was crazy, “Was that any reason to try and terrify me through the window?! I nearly had heart failure, you clod!”

“Maybe if you were paying attention instead of contemplating the window you wouldn't have been scared in the first place.” Lapis could already hear the grumbling from the other students in the room, thinking that she was picking a fight to pick a fight. It wouldn't have been the first time.

“Are you kidding me?” Peridot cried, her shrill pitch making everyone wince, “You were the one banging on my desk like some- some creepy…” Peridot struggled with her words for a moment before deciding on what to say, “Corvid!”

“Caw caw, motherfucker.” Lapis, satisfied at riling Peridot up, reached up and flicked her forehead. Before the indignant exclamation was even out of Peridot's mouth, she had turned on her heel, tossing her blue hair over her shoulder, and stalked towards her desk.

“No, nu-uh, do not walk away from me, you sorry excuse for an emo Barbie doll.” Peridot shouted after her, and Lapis knew she was being followed to her desk.

“Hey, bitch knew how to wing some liner.” Lapis tossed back carelessly, fluttering her eyelashes that boasted her own impressive make up. Lapis flopped into her seat and began to dig through her folders, half listening to Peridot rant as she pulled the forgotten test from this morning free and thrust it against the blonde’s chest.

“-prissy little punk! You couldn’t find manners if they came up and thumped you right in the head!” Peridot snatched the test away, “Wow thanks! Still doesn’t excuse your-!” her words dropped off as though a door had been slammed, and it had, the teacher coming in with an abrupt noise.

“Peridot, again?! I can hear you out in the hallway. We get it! Lapis is a jerk! Sit down and shut up already, this happens three times a week.” The teacher scolded, making Peridot huff and glare at him.

This teacher was the only person that spoke to students that way and they let him. As the designated ‘cool teacher’ of the school, he allowed them to get away with a lot, so it was only fair. Lapis had also been caught under his harsh words before, but it was more rare; she hardly ever lost her temper like Peridot did. 

Smirking, Lapis raised an eyebrow at Peridot, daring her to keep talking. Unfortunately Peri knew better than to test this teacher and she just glared back, jabbing a finger at Lapis as if to say that she wasn’t done. Then she turned and marched back to her desk.

_____________

The end of the day couldn’t come fast enough for Lapis, whose two favorite parts of the day only happened after the last bell rang. First was swim team, where she was the captain, a position that garnered her endless mermaid jokes. Certainly the fact that she was impossibly fast, faster in the water than she was on land, added to the illusion, but she was generally indifferent to the idea. Usually she was content to let the jokes slide since it made her seem more cool and she definitely did have dreams like that as a kid, but sometimes it got obnoxious to hear the same thing over and over again. 

Lapis honestly _could_ lose herself for hours at a time in the water. Just swimming laps and laps and feeling the working of her muscles, the rushing of the liquid and being in near total silence. That didn’t mean that everyone had to keep pointing her fixation out to her, but it was a small price to pay for her harmless addiction.

She did have to occasionally pull herself free of the water's temptation to actually help her team a bit, but the latter half of the club was dedicated to just swimming. They did have that competition coming up next month, but it wasn't the time to buckle down yet, so things were still relaxed.

Lapis's second favorite thing was what happened after swim team. 

“Lapis!” A young voice called, making the blue haired punk smile brightly. Little flip flops padded towards her quickly, making a funny echoing sound in the empty hallway. Small arms wrapped around her middle when Steven jumped at her in a diving tackle.

Well used to this greeting, Lapis easily caught him and swung him around, “Steven! Have you gotten taller since yesterday?”

Steven laughed joyfully, stumbling a bit when Lapis set him down, “Noooo, silly.” 

They both sat down on the floor outside the nurse's office. Steven's mother, Mrs. Quartz, always worked late, so Lapis had made his acquaintance a couple years ago. He was a really cheerful boy and Lapis always felt better after seeing him.

They chatted about their days for a few minutes before Lapis realized something. “Hey, Peridot is running really late today, huh? Usually she's here before me.”

“Yeah, I noticed that too.” Steven said, a thoughtful frown creasing his forehead, “I wonder if she got held up at her club.”

“I'm sure she's fine.” Lapis waved her hand, unworried, “But we could go get her if you like.”

Steven hopped to his feet, “Yeah! I'll just tell mom where I'm going.” He stuck his head into the office and hollered just that, then turned back to Lapis after closing the door, “Okay, let's go.”

They held hands on the way to the club room and Steven swung their arms back and forth and Lapis felt like she was young and untroubled as he went on about his favorite tv shows.

They heard Peridot’s nasally voice before they even turned the corner, the words unclear. She was shouting at someone, which wasn't unusual, but it wasn't Lapis, which _was_ strange.

“I guess it was Pearl holding her up.” Lapis commented as they drew closer. For all that Lapis and Peri were bitter rivals, Pearl was Peridot's second enemy of choice. Lapis could snark with the best of them, but she wasn't nearly so academic and that's where Pearl picked up the slack.

They had all their advanced classes together and were neck and neck in their grades. Things had only heated up in sophomore year when the fencing club had changed up their meeting days, which allowed Pearl to join the engineering club on a more regular basis.

“You can't just reduce the circuits to such delicate pieces, Pearl! This is a battle robot, it's going to be taking too much damage!” Peridot's voice rang out clearly as Steven inched the door open. 

Pearl and Peridot were standing at the chalkboard, pointing at a rough diagram. No one else was present and Lapis had the feeling that they were so engaged in their argument that neither noticed the rest of the club leave.

“And I'm telling you, Peridot, that if the bot is lighter it'll be able to maneuver better, meaning it won't take as many hits!” 

How many times had they gone over this? Lapis was torn between amusement and worry that the two were going to actually come to blows this time.

“Yeah? And I'm telling you that your tiny fencer brain is too small to comprehend how shoddy your blueprinting is!” Peridot raised up on her toes, getting right in Pearl's face.

“Say that again….” Pearl growled, hands clenched into fists.

“You're a stupid clod and your blueprints are shit!” Peridot cried and even Lapis was shocked. Peri rarely cursed.

Pearl drew back her fist and Lapis darted forward to grab it just as Steven exclaimed, “Guys! Don't fight!”

“Steven! Lapis!” Pearl said, shame coloring her voice. Peridot fell silent, looking at Lapis with an unreadable expression.

“Yeah, come on, if anyone's gonna turn the nerd to paste, it's gonna be me.” Lapis quipped, watching a small smirk tug at Peridot's lips.

“As if you could.” She said, a little weakly.

“You're right, I think I might hurt my back bending down to get you.” Satisfied that there was no more bodily threat against Peridot, Lapis let go of Pearl's fist. Still, she moved to stand between the two, canting her hip to the side and casually blocking their view of each other.

“I'm just in the perfect position to get your knees.” Peridot's shoulders relaxed, the familiar banter draining the tension from the room.

“More like my ankles.” Lapis exchanged a glance with Steven, who had come forward to stand at Pearl's side. He looked like he was struggling to hide his concern, brow creased in the middle. Steven hated seeing other people fight, everyone who knew him, knew that. He wrapped his arms around Pearl's waist until she accepted his affection, stroking his fluffy hair.

“All the better to bring you down, you clod.” Peridot was saying, still rather half heartedly.

“I think it's time to get on home, eh Peri-bot?” Lapis suggested, none too subtle.

“Yes, I'll see you tomorrow Steven.” Peri was quick to take the escape, waving at Steven amicably. She barely acknowledged Pearl and Lapis was quick to follow Peridot out of the room.

It was silent for a little while as the two made their way to the front of the school, the exit closest to the student parking lot. Then Lapis gave Peri's shoulder a little shove. “Man, you're always so fighty. She was really gonna hit you.”

“I know, I saw.” Peridot shook her head. “I don't know what I was thinking. If you hadn't stopped her, she would have knocked my cloddy head off.”

Lapis shrugged, “Yeah, I've seen her fence, she might have killed you. One punch, just bam! No more nerd. Sub nerd zero. Negative nerd.” Lapis wasn't usually this talkative, but she kept going anyway, determined to knock Peridot out of her funk. “Nerd minus. Nerd divided by zero, even.”

Finally that got a snort, “You're dumb.” 

“Ah, but it made you smile.” Lapis ruffled Peridot's bangs roughly, making her scowl, “I know what'll cheer you up.”

__________

Lapis threw her head back, hands clutching Peridot's back as Peridot drove the strap-on deep into her. “Ah! Ah! Fuck, Peri, right there! Oh, there therethereaahhaa-!” Lapis's voice cut off as her orgasm washed over her like a tsunami, the third of the day. Her nails raked harshly over Peridot's skin, raising welts immediately and maybe even drawing blood this time.

Peridot sank deep inside her, groaning as the vibrations stimulated her as well. Lapis whined as her pleasure spiked and didn't come down, the toy keeping a constant pressure against her most sensitive places. Sharp incisors sank into Lapis’ chest just below her collarbone, Peridot muffling her moan as she shuddered in her own orgasm.

Almost immediately, the vibrations shut off and Lapis relaxed, slumping back against the bed. “Fuck, I'm gonna be sore later. Been awhile since we hit three that rough.” 

Peridot could only make muffled noises against Lapis's skin; she was always much more sensitive after an orgasm and could barely handle one. On the few occasions that Lapis had managed to coax two out of her, she'd been useless until morning.

It was cute.

Gently pulling the strap-on back, Peridot let out a luxurious sigh. Lapis shivered at the feeling of it dragging across her walls, thighs shaking as the aftershocks of pleasure ran across her body.

Peri giggled, leaning down to kiss Lapis's thighs affectionately. “Ready for round four?” She joked and Lapis swatted the top of her head playfully. “You were right, though, this did cheer me up. Although…” Peridot straightened and grimaced, “I think I'm gonna need some peroxide.”

“Sorry boo,” though Lapis sounded less than sorry; she knew they both liked it, “am I a bad girlfriend if I say I love it when you're having a bad day? Because damn.” She leaned back, hands behind her head, watching Peridot reach down into their toy chest and begin pulling out their aftercare kit. 

“I dunno, am I a bad girlfriend for taking my bad days out on you?” Peridot handed a pack of wet wipes over to Lapis, stealing a few and a quick kiss before pulling back. They both began to clean themselves of various fluids, lapsing into silence as they concentrated on their after sex ritual.

Once the wipes were discarded into the wastebasket, Lapis said, “I mean... the sex might be rough, but it’s consensual. I know you’d never intentionally hurt me. More than I want you to, anyway,” she winked and Peridot grinned back at her as she climbed back on the bed and kneeled between Lapis’s legs. In her hands was a jar of cream, meant to soothe a variety of sensitive aches.

“It’s cold today,” Peri warned and Lapis nodded, bracing herself for the first touch of frigid fingers between her legs. She still gasped at the shock of it on her skin, but Peri continued to gently spread it over her abused flesh.

“Ahhh~” Lapis sighed, relaxing as the soreness began to fade, “you’re so good to me,” She moaned, flopping bonelessly against the bed. She heard Peridot giggling at her antics and smiled, “How is it that sex like this can feel so domestic? I have about ten thousand bite marks and you can probably never wear a tank top again, but I feel like this is our sitcom homelife.”

“I don’t think either of us are really sitcom kinda gals,” Peridot chuckled, setting aside the jar and cleaning her hands of the cream. She grabbed some antibacterial wipes and leaned forward to examine the newest bites on Lapis’s skin. She was always careful to keep them hidden under Lapis’s swimsuit lines, “But maybe it has something to do with the familiarity of doing this every day for two and a half years.”

Lapis winced as the stinging wipe came into contact with a particularly vicious bite; there was definitely some torn skin there, “You mean that on TV the stereotype is a husband coming home to dinner and a wife in the kitchen, but our stereotype is you coming home to me as dinner?”

Peridot laughed, teasingly tweaking Lapis’s nipple and earning herself a swat, “I can’t decide what’s more amusing, that you would regard yourself as the wife in this scenario or that you’d see me as the husband.” She bit her lip, looking down at Lapis with bedroom eyes, “Although, that might be a fun roleplay idea.”

“Hey, don’t get distracted and start us up again.” Lapis poked her in the belly, “Finish cleaning my bites so I can get to your back.”

Peridot looked as though she was actually contemplating another round, so Lapis kept poking her until she reached for some first aid ointment and began to apply it to the worst bites. 

“So, what do you have going on this week?” Peridot asked casually as she kneeled next to Lapis's side, rubbing the ointment into her skin.

“Well, there's a party this weekend,” Lapis offered with a careless shrug, “I got invited by Jenny during lunch.”

“Sounds like your kind of fun. Is Sour Cream DJing?” Keeping up the conversation, even as she expertly drew her fingers over Lapis’s wounds, was something of a ritual for them. It didn’t bother her that Lapis intended to go to this party without her, they both knew that it really wasn’t Peridot’s scene. Also, after being together for so long, both girls were content enough with their relationship to not have to be together all the time.

“Yeah, of course. As if he’d ever let Jenny throw a party without the best DJ in Beach City along. More than that, Jenny would never dream of asking anyone else. It’s literally unthinkable for the two of them,” Lapis chuckled, moving this way and that to allow Peridot more room to work. 

“Anyone you’re looking forward to seeing going?” A gentle pressure on Lapis’s hip was enough to get the girl to turn over and they shuffled around the bed for a moment before the answer came.

“I think it’s just gonna be the usual suspects, although I think Jay might be planning to make her grand reappearance,” they both chuckled at an inside joke about their flighty classmate.

It had taken a long time and lots of mistakes to get to this level of comfort with each other, but they were glad they had. Communication was key, especially since they were trying so hard to keep their relationship under wraps. 

Not that anything was ever easy about them, even now there were times they didn't always get along. Still, at the end of the day, they loved each other and thought the other was worth fighting for. Moments like this only solidified the feelings.

“Do you need to order any more of your drug detecting nail polish?” Peridot asked, giving Lapis a once over to make sure she hadn’t missed any injuries.

“Yeah, I should probably do that soon. I go through it way too much, but it’s definitely a great investment,” sitting up, Lapis leaned forward to kiss Peri’s forehead, “Leave it to my brainy girlfriend to find the perfect way of keeping me safe. Even when I’m off at irresponsible teen parties.”

A laugh escaped the smaller girl as they carefully moved around, Peridot scooching higher up and Lapis slipping off the side to go to their dresser, “As if I need to worry about you being irresponsible; you don’t even drink at those parties,” they shared another bout of knowing laughter, both amused at more jokes that existed only between them.

“What about you?” Lapis asked, slipping on some boy shorts and a tank top and sliding behind Peridot, “Any plans this weekend?”

“My mother is coming back into town so we're going out for dinner,” Peridot sat still and cross legged, not even having to hold her short hair up off her shoulders to allow access.

“How are you feeling about it?” Lapis leaned forward to begin cleaning Peridot's wounds. Her fair skin shone with scars from their previous encounters and the sight always filled Lapis with a sense of both pride and regret.

No matter how many times Peridot told her that she didn't mind, that she liked it and even got off on it, Lapis had complicated feelings at the evidence of the pain she inflicted on her lover. She soaked a cotton ball in peroxide and gently patted it across the nail marks on Peridot's back.

“Uh, I, hmmm…” Peridot trembled, goosebumps rising instantly at Lapis's touch. That made Lapis giggle, after all this time it seemed that her little nerd developed a bit of a Pavlovian response to her back being touched. Either with pain or gentle touches, Peridot always seemed to get worked up. 

“Does it sting, boo?” Lapis teased, dragging the cotton ball over the angry welts.

“Ye-Yeah. It's making me tingle.” Peridot admitted, gasping and clenching her fists when Lapis drew over an open cut. 

“I love it when you get like this,” Lapis whispered, using her free hand to drag blunted nails up Peridot's side, “Usually you're driving me wild and not the other way around.”

“Lapis, God you're making me…” Peridot trailed off into a moan. Her voice was certainly having an effect on Lapis, too, and she worried about dirtying her clean underwear.

“Let's go take a shower.” Lapis suggested in a breathy voice. Peridot's agreement came in the form of her surging off the bed and grabbing Lapis's wrist eagerly. 

__________

Lapis stroked Peridot's hair as the girl snored against her chest. She'd thoroughly exhausted her smaller lover with another two orgasms, even though Peridot had thought she couldn't handle a third in one day. 

Lapis was happy to prove her wrong, but then she'd had to carry her out of the shower, Peridot totally limp with exhaustion. She'd been mumbling what Lapis thought might have been sweet nothings, but could have easily been vague cursing. Sometimes Peridot got amusingly ornery after Lapis wore her out.

Smiling, Lapis closed her eyes and finally let sleep take her, content in the knowledge that the girl in her arms wasn't going anywhere.


	2. Shaque Damour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, things are just hard.

When she woke next, Lapis became aware of small fingers stroking her skin in slow patterns. It felt good, soothing, bringing Lapis slowly back into the living world in the most gentle way possible. Up and down her side, fingers tracing her ribs, skirting around her breast, and up her collar bone. 

“Trying to get in an early morning fuck? Because that feels good.” Lapis teased.

Peridot giggled, voice husky with sleep and making Lapis shiver. How could one nerd be so sexy? “No, I just can't help it. You're so beautiful and I've got no impulse control this early. I just needed to make sure you were still real.” 

Lapis felt her heart melt, “I like morning after three orgasms you. You're usually never this sweet.”

Peridot outright laughed now, “Don't get used to it, Laz.” She planted a kiss against Lapis's nose, “Or maybe do. You know I love you.”

“Gosh, and a profession of love? You gonna cook breakfast, too?” Grinning, Lapis sat up slowly, pulling Peridot closer and enjoying the skin on skin. 

“You know what? I think I will. I certainly worked up an appetite. That is, if you don't mind getting coffee started?” They shared a smile and Lapis agreed, both hurrying to get dressed.

Glancing at the clock, Lapis realized that they were up a full half hour before their alarms went off, “Man, Per bear, what got you up so early?”

“I dunno, maybe because I slept so hard last night,” Peridot grabbed their bags as they left the room, then gave a disgruntled noise as books spilled onto the floor, “Darn. Hold on a sec.”

Lapis turned and bent to help her pick everything up, “I got you,” She picked up a textbook and folder, but a piece of paper fluttered out. Lapis recognized Peridot's art from yesterday.

It really was a great piece. Peridot had ample practice with perfecting blueprints, which oddly translated into a steady hand and an eye for detail. The other girl excelled at pen drawings and this was no exception. 

Lapis didn't really mean to, but she was struck by her girlfriend's talent, her eyes roamed over the drawing and landed on the teacher's comments, on a large sticky note attached to the top of the page.

_'I wish that you'd take my advice and submit something for the art show. Talent like this shouldn't be wasted in high school art and you really have a chance to make something of yourself in this world. Don't let anyone hold you back, even yourself. You've told me you love drawing, please give the show another thought.’_

“Hey!” Peridot snatched the drawing from her hand.

“This is why you've been so upset about art?” Lapis blinked at her, watching Peridot turn away and clutch the piece to her chest defensively.

They stood in silence for a moment, then Peridot spoke in a shaky voice, “I know you've been wanting to get into that show.”

It was true, Lapis had been submitting pieces to the teacher since the beginning of the year. The art show was a huge charity event that was going to be around the end of the year and it would have tons of big names there looking for fresh talent. 

Lapis hadn't had a single piece approved.

She'd ranted about it to Peridot several times, lamenting the disparaging comments returned with each piece. The teacher had agreed that while her pieces were technically good, they just seemed to be missing something. She'd been advised to stop making art with the intention of submitting it and start making art about things that inspired her.

Lapis just found it so hard to open up in that way. Really, she'd only ever created a few works based solely on inspiration and most of them were of the girl standing in front of her.

“Peridot…” Lapis whispered quietly, realizing the problem. “I'm… not going to be upset with you if you want to submit something. You love art as much as I do.”

“But I don't want to!” Peridot burst out, still hunched into herself, “I love art, but I don't want to make a career of it. Not like you do.” The last part was whispered, fearfully, mournfully.

“Are you more upset at the teacher trying to coerce you into submitting or that she chose you over me?” Lapis asked, knowing it sounded arrogant, but also knowing that it was something to clarify. By the way Peri flinched, she could guess it was the second option.

“Your art is so good. Your use of color is just phenomenal, your proportions are magnificent, and your scenes are breathtaking. I love every piece you make, I don't even dream as vividly as you paint. I just can't understand how she can…” Peridot paused, weighing her words carefully. Lapis let her, knowing when she needed to be patient.

“How she can choose someone who doesn't want this over someone that does. How she can choose my colorless drawings over your exquisite paintings.” 

Lapis inched closer cautiously, watching Peridot for any sign of discomfort. When there was none, she slipped up to her girlfriend's side and wrapped an arm around her waist. 

“Because they're just as good as my paintings. Better even. What you lack in color you make up for in detail. Look at this,” Lapis gestured to the drawing, “How sharp the lines are, how you captured every shadow and tuft of fur, the glint off it's teeth and the look in it’s eyes. This thing could jump off the page and I wouldn't be surprised.”

Slowly, Lapis encircled Peridot in her arms, resting her cheek against the side of Peri's head, “She chose you because this has feeling behind it. You weren't trying to impress anyone but yourself and you managed to impress everyone else. I love this, I love you, and I'll never hold your success against you.”

“Even if it hurts you?” Peridot said and Lapis's heart broke at the whimper from under her chin.

“Yes, even then. Sure, I'm a little sore, but I can't be mad when this has so obviously been eating you up. I'll just have to try and work harder, put myself out there. If I ever expect to make art for a living, I need to get used to taking criticism and advice from my mentors.”

They stood embracing in the hallway for a long moment, Lapis just holding her girlfriend and waiting for her anxiety to subside. Finally, Peridot noticeably relaxed, leaning into Lapis's arms, and Lapis kissed the top of her head. 

“Better?” Lapis asked softly.

“Better.” Came the quiet response.

“Come on, let's go get breakfast. I'll cook if you want to do coffee.” That was their usual set up, when they were early enough to actually eat at home.

“That's agreeable.”

_________

At school things went as they normally did. They always split up before coming near the grounds so that no one would suspect they came together. Lapis noticed that Peridot was still rather subdued after this morning, so she was extra aggressive in pushing her buttons.

The best way to break Peri out of her funk was to make her angry.

Lapis was gratified to see that it worked, too. By the time lunch had passed, Peridot was back to full energy and using every bit of her considerable vocabulary to hurl insults and banter back and forth with Lapis. They were both in fine form by last period, so much so that they gathered a crowd hoping for an actual fight to break out.

Lapis saw money changing hands and could barely suppress a grin. Throughout all the time she and Peri had known each other, they'd never once come to blows. However, it was pretty fun to keep people guessing.

More than anything, Lapis was just happy that her girlfriend was okay. When the teacher stepped in to break them up, Lapis flashed Peri a wink and got a smirk in return. They were going to be fine.

__________

When she went to go hang out with Steven after swim practice, Lapis found him and Peridot sitting on the floor, heads bent together over two large pieces of paper. Raising an eyebrow at the sight of two of the most excitable people she knew being still and quiet, Lapis carefully padded over.

“Lazuli,” Peridot greeted without looking up, reaching out to hand Lapis a blank sheet of paper, “Nice of you to finally join us. Now you can get to work, too.”

“We're making posters for my dad!” Steven said happily, “He's starting guitar lessons and needs some advertisement. Do you wanna help?”

Lapis plopped lazily beside them, glancing at their works. Steven had drawn his dad rocking out on his guitar with lightning bolts around him. The words ‘Guitar Dad’ and his contact information were at the bottom. It was cute and sweet and really not the greatest, but it had personality and Lapis loved it.

Peridot's drawing was a lovingly recreated picture of a guitar, the background filled with music notes and large speakers and amps. Lapis realized that she was drawing a stage where, presumably, a rock show was taking place. 

Lapis pulled out her paints and a water bottle, humming as she pondered what she would put down. After a moment of glancing between Peridot and Seven, she decided. If Peridot was drawing a view of the front of the stage, Lapis would paint a view from on the stage.

“This is really nice of you, Steven,” Lapis commented, drawing brown along the bottom of her paper where she wanted the stage floor to be. 

“Aww, I mean, it's the least I can do. My dad is really good, you guys, and I just want everyone to know that, too.” Steven chirped with a smile. Lapis felt her heart melt.

“If he's really that good, maybe he can even teach Peridot over here.” She smirked, nudging Peri's knee with her wrist. She saw Peridot roll her eyes in a full body motion.

“You'll never let me live that down, huh?” She grumbled, not looking up as she began to sketch some words at the bottom of the page.

“Why would I ever let you forget the time you shattered windows playing a guitar chord because you were too stubborn to ask for help?” Lapis shot back, making sure to spell out the situation for Steven. “Everyone in class had hearing trouble for the rest of the week.” 

“It was only a few hours, don't exaggerate,” Peridot scolded. 

“I'm sure my dad would be happy to teach you, Dot,” Steven threw in, half in excitement, half to stop their bickering. He'd tried numerous times to get them to stop over the years, but only managed to succeed in getting them to tone it down in his presence.

“I'll think about it,” Peridot conceded, “I have been thinking lately that it might be nice to expand my horizons. Perhaps I'll pick up bass guitar, if that's something he teaches.”

“Maybe a ukulele is more your style, half pint,” Lapis prodded, giving Peri a mischievous grin when she looked up to glare.

“Dad can teach both! He taught me the ukulele,” Steven interjected, gaining both girl's attention.

“Really? You'll have to play for us one day,” Lapis suggested, sharing a genuinely surprised look with Peridot, “I'm sure we'd both love to hear you, right?”

“Yes, Steven, I would very much enjoy listening to one of your renditions,” Peridot gave a gentle smile, “Perhaps once I learn we could even play together.”

Steven gasped, “We could be jam buds. Oh, maybe you could even play with me and Connie! She's great at the violin.”

Lapis watched as the two talked about music, turning her attention back to her painting. She'd barely even realized her hand had kept moving while she was in conversation with them and she'd framed the bottom two thirds of the paper with the stage. Smiling at the image in her head, she cleaned her brush in the water bottle and began working on the audience looking out from the page.

She'd performed on stage once in middle school and dived off a stage at an underground rock show just last summer, so she had memories of what it was like to be on the stage looking out at the people. Lapis loved watercolor because it was much easier to bring her ideas to life without asking for too much detail. She dreamed in colors and feelings, she remembered everything like she was looking at it through static.

Nothing was ever clear to her.

Except Peridot.

Which is why her best work was always of the other girl. She saw Peri in stark detail compared to everything else around her. Even now, with her audience, she only had vague recollections of faces and camera flashes. It was the energy she remembered best, the feeling of diving off stage and feeling a dozen hands catch her. Looking out into her friends and family's faces and seeing their awe as she recited lines with tears streaming down her face and passion in her voice.

“Wow, Lapis, that looks really great,” Steven said, snapping Lapis back to reality. She looked up at him in surprise, finding him and Peridot only inches away, “I feel like they're moving and cheering.”

Peridot was silent, but when Lapis glanced at her, there was excitement in her face. She glanced meaningfully up at Lapis and then down at the paper, but Lapis couldn't begin to guess her idea. 

Seeming to realize that she wasn't being understood, Peridot said, voice quiet, “Even I have to admit that work is great, Lazuli. There's something electric about it. Looking at it gives me goosebumps.”

Lapis and Steven both stared at her; Steven because he’d never heard Peridot say anything nice about Lapis and Lapis because this was a total break from character, “That’s… high praise coming from you,” she mumbled in confusion.

“Wasn’t the art teacher saying that you needed to do something like this?” Peridot pressed and Lapis suddenly understood. 

Her eyes jerked back down to her drawing, examining her work in more detail. She’d been lost in memories when she’d done this, not thinking about the assignment itself. It looked messy and there were places where the colors bled into each other, making Lapis frown. Normally she was meticulous about each stroke, but here she’d hardly been paying attention.

“It’s messy,” she protested.

“It’s organic,” Peridot countered, “That has to be what’s been missing. You’ve been too worried about perfection and missing out on the feeling. She’s always saying that your paintings are technically perfect and they are. This is beyond perfection, though, this is real and your feelings shine through.”

Lapis tilted her head this way and that, but all she could see were the flaws, “I don’t…” She shot Peri a forlorn look, hoping that she’d understand.

“I may be a lot of things, Lazuli, but I’m no liar,” Peridot boasted with a grin, eyes flicking to Steven as he stared between them in awe, “And I know your skills,” she grew silent, face flushing, then struggled to finish what she wanted to say, “This…. Is good. Really.”

“Awww! I knew you two could get along!” Steven jumped at Peridot, engulfing her in a hug. She grumbled, but didn’t push him away, “You guys will be best friends soon.”

“Fat chance, Steven,” Peridot was quick to say, shooting Lapis a panicked look over his shoulder, “No way me and Angst Me Elmo over here will ever be friends.”

“As if a walking textbook could ever be cool enough to hang with me,” Lapis winked at the disgruntled look Peri sent her.

Steven groaned and backed away from Peridot to give them both exasperated glare, “Guys~ cut it out.”

“Sorry Steven, I don’t think Periscope and I will ever get along,” Lapis shrugged nonchalantly, “She’s an arrogant jerk, I’m a selfish dickhead, we’re a match made in heck.”

Steven turned to Peridot with a pleading expression, begging her to disagree. She just shrugged, “Sorry Steven, she’s right. We’ll never be close.”

___________________

Lapis moaned when two fingers slipped inside her slowly; Peridot seemed intent on being sweet to her after all the rough sex they’d had yesterday. Currently, she was laid back on the little loveseat in Peridot’s room, Peri leaning over her, the television blaring forgotten beside them. Lips assaulted her throat and jaw, careful not to leave any marks. The gentle ministrations sent shivers up and down Lapis’s spine.

It was so rare between the two of them for things to go slow, they were both energetic lovers and both very much got off on pain, slow love making like this was almost a kink considering how little it happened. Now Lapis was slowly being driven insane by the combination of loving touches, engulfing warmth, and her lover’s experience. Peridot fingers were small, but she knew exactly how to curl them to make Lapis see stars.

“You feel so good.” Peridot murmured as she came up for air, nuzzling Lapis’s shoulder, “I love how you feel around my fingers; hot and wet and tight. I adore how wet I can make you.” Lapis felt her face flushing at the words. Peridot was always the more talkative of the two and it was never more noticeable when she was taking her time like this, “You have no idea how much it turns me on when I get you dripping like this.”

“Fuck, Peri...” Lapis whimpered, feeling a thumb brush over her clit. She buried her fingers in Peridot’s hair and held her close, listening to all the praise that crossed her mind and fell from her mouth in a slow torrent of words. The way she said them was so sincere that Lapis knew it was the absolute truth.

“I just want to keep you like this for hours, connected so intimately, hearing you moaning in my ear, wrapped around my body.” Peridot shifted and Lapis felt her thigh come into contact with something slick and wet, realizing belatedly that Peridot was grinding against her leg. Her breath hitched and her legs trembled, heart rate skyrocketing at the tangible proof of her lover’s arousal. “See what you do to me?” came a breathy giggle in her ear before sharp teeth gave a playful scrape to the sensitive flesh there.

Lapis found herself unable to even form words at this point, giving a quiet cry when a third finger slipped inside her and Peri began to rock against her. The naughty words from Peridot faded into intoxicating groans as they writhed together in bliss, Lapis tossing her head back carefully in pleasure. Her orgasm was building a pressure low in her belly that was so close to release that she could barely breathe.

Then something out of the ordinary happened; Peridot pulled her head back from where it had been buried in Lapis’s neck and looked her lover in the face. Surprised, Lapis stared back, finding it hard to keep her eyes open as they still ground together. “Lapis.” Peridot started, voice breathless, “I love you. More than anyone or anything else. You are so special, and so special to me, that I sometimes can’t even find the words to describe how I feel for you. You make me understand color, you make me wanna learn an instrument so I can serenade you. You make me think of the future.”

Lapis felt her breath hitch for a totally different reason, blinking hard to fight back the sudden tears those words and their sincerity brought forth, “Are you trying to make me cum or cry?” she managed to gasp out, teetering on the edge.

Peridot gave a little huffing laugh and Lapis could see tears in her eyes, too, “How about both?” Then she crooked her fingers inside of Lapis and deliberately dragged across a certain spot while her thumb copied the motioned against her clit. Lapis saw white, her orgasm thundering over her like a stampede.

When she came back to awareness, the first thing Lapis noticed was a gentle hand stroking her hair. “Mmmm, god Peri. That was a really good one.” She pried her eyes open enough to glance at her girlfriend.

Peridot was looking down at her with a gentle smile, eyes rimmed red with tears, but expression otherwise satisfied, “Good, I’m glad.” Her knuckles brushed delicately across Lapis’s cheek, “And I told you I could get you to do both.” 

Lapis realized that her skin was clammy with the feeling of fresh tears drying, “Not that I mind the sentiment, but what was that about? Are you okay, boo?”

Peridot snuggled down onto the couch and pressed herself against Lapis’s side, “I just love you a lot. Been thinking about stuff.”

“Stuff you wanna share?” Lapis pressed gently.

“Yeah, but also… some of it is hard to put into words.” Peridot paused to collect her thoughts, “Our relationship has always been difficult, but the ups have been more than worth the downs. Still are, even. I’ve just been thinking about college and our future together and our parents finding out and stuff.”

“I thought we already had our colleges scouted out? You go for tech stuff, I go for swimming and arts and we’ll try to go to either the same college or someplace within driving distance of each other.” Lapis lightly stroked Peridot’s back, “Plus, I have a good bit of money saved up from my summer jobs and you’ve been doing those programming commissions. I put my info out on my social media for paintings, too, and I’ve already got a few emails.”

“I know. I’m just…” Peridot made a strange squeaky groan into her shoulder.

“Thinking of the worst cases again?” Lapis guessed, receiving a nod in return. “Don’t worry, we’ll find a way to make this work. We have for all this time.”

“The… statistics for high school sweethearts staying together isn’t great, you know?” Was the muffled grumble.

“I know this is really eating you up if you’re bringing out math.” Lapis chuckled, “We’ve both read, what? A dozen healthy relationship guide books and we’ve already been together two and a half years. We can do this.”

“But… the real world isn’t like high school.” Peridot practically whimpered.

“No, but we have an advantage in that we’re already practically living together, like real adults. And our shitty parents just mean we’re more prepared for the real world.” They’d had this same conversation a few times, so Lapis was well used to being patient with her lover’s anxiety.

There was silence against her shoulder and Lapis leaned back to look down. Peridot was frowning, but thoughtfully, thinking over Lapis’s words, “That is true. And we’ve both worked and juggled school before.”

“But?” Lapis prompted gently.

“Have you thought about… us?” Came the meek reply.

“Us how? Because the answer is yes, I’ve thought a lot about us. You make me happy and I want to continue this thing we have.”

“Have you thought about marriage?” Peridot's voice was so quiet Lapis wasn't sure she heard her for a moment, but when her words sunk in, Lapis froze.

Growing up with devoutly Catholic parents meant that Lapis had certain ideals drilled into her head from a young age. Lapis was expected to be married to a fine Catholic man and churn out a half dozen little babies. Her mother had tried to convince her that this was every little girl's dream and, for a while, Lapis had believed her.

Of course, realizing that she was gay put a damper on these plans and sent Lapis into a depressive cycle in middle school that lasted until she became friends with Peridot in her freshman year. To this day, Lapis wasn't sure Peridot really understood how she'd literally saved Lapis's life by just being there. 

So, to say that Lapis had complicated feelings about marriage was an understatement. There was a part of her, the little girl that listened to her mother talk about her own wedding and describe the magical feelings that came with the experience, that desired marriage and romance. The other part, the rebel, the one that had been told that her attraction was sick and wrong, was afraid of taking that intimate step. 

However, if there was anyone Lapis had ever thought about marrying, it would have been Peridot.

After a second to get over her shock, Lapis sighed, “I have.”

“...But?” Peridot prompted nervously when Lapis fell silent.

“But…. It's hard. To, uh, I dunno. Reconcile my thoughts about it with what my parents think about it?” She didn't really mean for that to come out like a question, but Lapis was finding it difficult to come up with the proper words.

Peridot shifted anxiously against her and Lapis held her tighter, “I know that it's such a cliche thing.” She murmured into Lapis's skin, “But I want that with you. I want that contract, I want that sitcom.”

Lapis sighed, because she knew she was being silly, but she couldn't help the instinctual panic that welled up inside her at that word, “I do, too. I'm sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me. Objectively, marriage can only help us, but there's something about it that just makes me…. I dunno, freak out? And I don't want you to think I'm not committed to you, because I am, but…”

“But it feels like a cage?” Lapis winced at the bitterness in Peridot's voice.

“But it feels like going to church.” Lapis tried to clarify and immediately knew she said the wrong thing.

Peridot was well aware of Lapis's love hate relationship with the church. She'd been told her whole life to trust in it as an institution and Peridot knew how guilty Lapis felt when she both attended and avoided it. To compare marrying Peridot to the panic attack inducing feelings she associated with her faith was insulting to the highest degree.

The hurt look that took over Peridot's face had Lapis sputtering as she tried to backtrack. “No! I mean, not marrying you, but marriage in general! Because it's such a heteronormative process and I'm anything but. And you know that's why I feel so bad when I go to church, I just can't help it.”

“All I'm hearing is that the thought of marrying me makes you feel bad.” Peridot grumbled. 

Lapis felt her anxiety turn to impatience; why couldn't Peridot just understand? This wasn't about her, this was Lapis's problem. “Don't twist my words, you know that's not what I mean.”

“What am I supposed to think? You have such complicated feelings about your religion and now you've lumped me in there.” Peridot crossed her arms and turned her head away petulantly.

Lapis growled and jerked away from her, skin suddenly feeling like she was burning, and not in a good way. “If you know I have complicated feelings, then why are you being like this? How could you have possibly expected me to be okay with marriage?”

“Because it's with me!” Peridot exclaimed and they were both suddenly on their feet. “I guess I just thought it would be different, that I was different!”

“You are!” Lapis cried and hated how her eyes burned with tears. She turned sharply and started gathering her discarded clothing, trying to blink them away and not let Peridot see. “I would never have let anyone else get close enough to even consider marriage with them. You know I'm no good, Peri, you know that! Why are you so surprised when things like this happen?”

Peridot fell silent, watching her as she dressed, and Lapis wasn't sure if she wanted her to tell her to stay or let her go. Either way, Peridot remained silent, standing naked by the love seat, and Lapis couldn't bring herself to look up at her.

“Because I don't think you're no good.” Peridot finally said as Lapis stood, fully dressed, facing the door, “Because I'd be happy to marry you. I'd feel privileged. You're beautiful and brilliant and quick as a whip. I love you more than anyone.”

Lapis's breath hitched, “Maybe you shouldn't.”

“Lapis…” Peridot started, but Lapis cut her off.

“I think I need to be alone for a while. I'll text you when I calm down.” Without waiting for anything else, Lapis headed for the door, refusing to look back. 

______

Going home was bittersweet, especially after fighting with her girlfriend. The house was always dark and silent and Lapis hated turning on the lights because then she could clearly see the religious memorabilia that decorated the walls. It made her feel guilty; she was a bad daughter and a bad girlfriend and a bad person and just a mess in general.

Lapis hurried to her room, having not seen the interior in more than a month. Lapis lived at Peridot's house when her parents weren't home. And since Lapis's parents and Peridot's mother were currently competing for most absentee guardians, there was usually never a reason for Lapis to come back when the house was still empty like this.

Her room smelled like dust and disuse, making Lapis wrinkle her nose. She was used to Peridot's place, the scent of citrus spray over sweat, sex, and junk food. With a sigh, Lapis grabbed the air freshener she'd long since stolen from her girlfriend's home and sprayed it half heartedly around the room.

Barely an hour and she was already missing Peridot. How sad was she?

It's not like they couldn't function without each other. Both girls had very different ideas of a fun weekend and often spent at least one or two nights apart then. They more than made up for it by spending the weekdays together, but it was nice that they didn't try to tie each other down. It was indicative of the trust they had in each other.

This was not like that. Fighting was something they didn't do with any regularity and when something serious cropped up like this, it was always the worst feeling. Lapis sighed and flopped face down in her bed; she had to resist the urge to text her girlfriend. She really needed to force herself to think over this problem.

Taking a deep breath, Lapis imagined it, getting married to Peridot. Walking down the aisle, her in a white gown, Peridot in a cute tux. Their friends and family watching them and crying happy tears.

Except that's not how it would go, would it?

No, if Peri was a man, maybe, but she wasn't and therein lay the problem. Lapis grunted in displeasure; internalized homophobia was a bitch. Still, she couldn't shake the feeling that her little daydream was just inherently wrong.

Just… Not the marrying Peridot part, that was the only thing that actually felt right. 

Lapis decided to explore her daydream a bit more. She tried imagining them both in dresses, then both in tuxedos. She imagined a huge Catholic wedding, then maybe a Jewish one, even though she wasn't entirely sure what that looked like. Peridot wasn't nearly as invested in her own religion as Lapis was, so they had never really talked about it.

Rolling over onto her back, Lapis glared at the ceiling, hands behind her head as her mind worked overtime. Maybe morning? Or night? On the beach? In the forest? Maybe it would just be blood relatives? Or people they knew from school?

Maybe just Steven, they both liked him. He could be best man to them both. Lapis felt a smile tug at her lips at that, imagining her and Peridot in their school clothes, standing in a white archway with no one around but Steven and a priest. They'd hold hands and look deep into each other's eyes and no one would judge them. 

Maybe not even a priest would be there, maybe just a judge. That way they could avoid religion altogether. Without imagining her parent's eyes on her, the thought seemed to be more soothing than anxiety inducing. 

Steven would hand over the rings and maybe his parents could act as witnesses. That was a thing, right? Did they even need anyone they knew to be there? What if it was just them and a judge? Lapis paused, her daydream screeching to a halt. 

What _if_ it was just them and a judge?

Marriage was just a contract at its heart. Sure they loved each other, but you didn't even need that to agree to claim each other on your tax forms or share health insurance. Shit, was this her solution? Eloping?

Would Peridot be okay with that? The thought hit her like a truck.

Would she? Lapis sat up with a sudden frantic energy.

What if she was tired of the secrets? What if that was the last straw?

Lapis's chest felt tight, breath coming short and tears pricking her eyes. Why couldn't she just be normal for once? Why did turmoil like this always send her into a hyperventilating panic attack?

Curling up on her side, Lapis struggled to breathe and push away the idea of Peridot finally leaving her. She clenched her eyes shut and started counting, trying to sync her breaths to the rhythm of the numbers. Usually if this happened, she'd call Peri, but unfortunately that just wasn't an option right now. 

So all she could do was struggle and sob and gasp for air.

It took her far longer than usual to calm herself and she had to resort to imagining Peridot's voice counting in her head, but, finally, she managed. By the time her attack faded, leaving her in a red faced mess, Lapis was exhausted. 

She fell into a fitful sleep.


	3. Alone in Plan 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes feelings don't have an easy or clean fix. Sometimes things just suck.

The next day was awful right from the start; Lapis woke up alone. Her face and throat hurt from her panic attack and crying jag the night before and, when she checked herself in her mirror, she was dismayed to find her face noticeably puffy.

A cool shower was taken to attempt to alleviate that, but it did nothing to lift her spirits. Really, she only had herself to blame for this. On top of that, she hadn't even texted Peridot, so her girlfriend must think that she was still upset.

Which she was, just not at the marriage thing anymore. No, Lapis had knocked herself into a good, old fashioned depressive episode. She found herself listlessly readying herself for school, pulling on a t-shirt she'd stolen from her girlfriend that smelled like the citrus air freshener. Luckily it was a size too big on Peri, so it fit her like a glove.

Her favorite leather jacket was pulled on next and Lapis buried her cheek against the ring of faux fur that lined the collar. She drew on some baggy jeans and ratty sneakers, completing her comfort look. 

She hardly ever let herself dress like this; this was Lazy Lapis, a persona that only ever came to light when she was too sad to put effort into her appearance. Luckily the only one that would realize or care would be Peridot and a small, vengeful part of Lapis hoped it made her feel bad.

That thought instantly made her feel worse and she groaned, burying her face in Peridot's shirt. She inhaled, thinking of small arms wrapped around her middle, curious fingers tracing the ridges of her spine. Tactile comfort and unconditional love.

Lapis wanted to cry, but she had to walk to school, so she didn't.

_________

She was aware of Peridot's eyes on her the moment she entered the classroom, but Lapis just didn't have the energy to lift her head enough to look back. She trudged to her desk and flopped into it, resting her head on her arms.

“Woah, rough night, girl?” Came Amethyst's voice beside her.

Lapis grunted in response.

“Dang, I knew you were a party animal, but I didn't think you were in the middle of the week.” Amethyst laughed, patting her on the back.

Lapis paused, then mentally shrugged. She had no idea where the idea of her being a crazy party girl came from, but she was willing to roll with it if it gave her an excuse to feel bad. Sure she went to most parties and she could even be coaxed into some traditional drunken shenanigans, but Lapis herself never drank in public.

She had a phobia about losing control, so she avoided alcohol and crowds like the plague. The only time she ever drank was with Peridot and that was only on special occasions. Peri was a total lightweight and, honestly, so was Lapis. They could usually split a bottle of wine and it either made them amorous or weepy.

Thinking about Peridot right _now_ was making her weepy, so Lapis tried to shut those thoughts down quickly. 

“What can I say?” She mumbled to Amethyst and hoped her voice was steady.

“So I'm guessing I'll be seeing you at the party this weekend?” Amethyst thankfully didn't seem to notice anything off about her.

“Yeah, def. I think the bigger question is, are you actually coming this time?” Lapis returned, lazily tilting her face towards her neighbor.

Amethyst was a notorious wild child, but her friends did their level best to keep her away from parties with alcohol at them. She'd tried many times to get to a party, but something always seemed to come up last minute that she couldn't get out of.

“Heck yeah, I even have my sisters covering for me, this time. Steven won't need a babysitter, Pearl and Garnet are planning separate nights with their parents, and I've even done all my homework. I'll be there or die trying.” Amethyst swore dramatically.

“Let's keep the dying to a minimum, huh?” Lapis said dryly. She didn't want to admit it, but the casual conversation was distracting her enough that she began to feel her energy coming back. She lifted her head off the table and glanced towards her girlfriend's desk.

Peridot was slumped over despondently, cheek pressed to her palm. She was turned in such a way that she could glance back at Lapis and the realization made guilt wash over her. Peridot was worried about her and probably feeling like this depression was her fault.

It wasn't, it was all Lapis's messed up head. 

Their eyes met briefly and Lapis felt a wave of shame wash over her. Peri deserved better than her, she deserved someone who would jump at the chance to marry her. Not someone like Lapis, not someone with this much baggage.

Feeling vaguely sick to her stomach with guilt, Lapis broke her gaze and set her head back down. “Hey, will you wake me when class is over?”

________

The rest of the week passed by in the same manner. Lapis couldn't seem to get back on her feet; every time she got close, she'd meet Peridot's eyes and be reminded about how this was her fault to begin with. She didn't even go to swim club she was feeling so bad, and that also had the unintended side effect of making her miss meeting Steven and Peridot after school.

She couldn't convince herself that she didn't miss them both. 

She didn't even want to go to this stupid party anymore, but she had to keep up appearances. So Lapis sighed as she painted her nails with her special polish and sighed when she did her make up and sighed as she threw on a too-thin-for-the-fall-weather dress. 

She didn't have a car, but that was fine, the party was only a few blocks away and she preferred the walk anyway. Lapis could hear the music thumping from the house as she arrived, but it seemed to be mostly contained to indoors. There were cars lining the block, but only a few people were on the front lawn and they looked to be arriving just now.

Lapis ambled towards the house, steeling herself for what awaited her inside.

It was far more crowded inside than she had been expecting, it seemed that most of the senior class had been invited. Lapis immediately felt on edge, the crowd and the loud music making her wish she hadn't agreed to come and just stayed home with Peri.

_Oh wait, I couldn't have even done that tonight. What a dumbass I am._

“Lapis! Hey!” A familiar and distinctive voice called out and Lapis turned to find Amethyst, already a few sheets to the wind, coming up to greet her.

Lapis made an effort to smile, “Glad you made it!” She called over the music, taking a drink the other girl offered. She wouldn't drink it, but just holding it meant that no one would be shoving another into her hand anytime soon. She'd switch it out for soda later and claim it was a mixed drink if anyone asked.

“I told you I would!” Amethyst tossed her arms up and nearly upended her own drink as she did a little jig. Lapis couldn't help how her smile turned more genuine.

At least someone was having fun.

“You wanna go dance?” Lapis asked, pointing towards a throng of people surging together in a kind of dance floor slash mosh pit.

“Do I?! Let's go, baby, yeah!” Amethyst grabbed Lapis around the waist and dragged her towards the mass. There was an upbeat tune playing and Lapis began to rock her hips and pump her arms to the beat. She felt mechanical, going through the motions, wishing it was Peridot laughing and bouncing around in front of her. 

She would call her girlfriend after the party and apologize, Lapis resolved. The only thing to do until then was try to distract herself. So she closed her eyes and tried to lose herself in the music.

Lapis wasn't sure how much time had passed while she danced, but eventually the tune changed to something much slower. Her eyes popped open and she looked down at the questioning expression on Amethyst's face. 

She shook her head, “Sorry lady! My slow dances are reserved for someone special!” But she grabbed Amethyst's elbow and pulled her off towards the kitchen, “But lets get a drink to cool down!”

Lapis hadn't realized how hot and tired she was until they were out of the energetic crowd. Her beer was warm and it went down the drain without a second thought, replaced with cool tap water. She gulped down a cup, then refilled it and passed it to Amethyst.

“I need a fresh beer!” Amethyst said after handing the emptied cup back. Lapis nodded and watched her amble off into the dining room where she assumed she'd find something to her liking. 

Lapis took the opportunity to raid the fridge for soda, finding Peridot's favored drink in a two liter on the door. Sighing in melancholy, Lapis grabbed the too sweet soda and poured herself a full cup. Taking a drink reminded her of all the times she'd tasted it on Peridot's lips.

Maybe she should call her now…

Heaving a sigh, Lapis reached into her back pocket and pulled out her phone. She was surprised to find that she had a text from her girlfriend. Usually Peridot was never the first one to reach out, she long understood that Lapis needed time alone when she got like this. This was unusual and Lapis felt a spike of worry, opening the message immediately.

**A Dorito <9:38>: I know that you usually prefer silence from me when you're feeling bad, but I just couldn't let you go to that party without saying that I hope you have fun and please come home safe. I love you.**

Lapis felt like crying; what did she do to deserve someone that loved her this much? The answer was ‘nothing’, she _didn't_ deserve this. Still, she felt grateful and warm inside and she was definitely going to call her girlfriend right now and talk to her, party be damned.

Turning on her heel, Lapis found herself face to face with a girl she knew from school. As she went to apologize for nearly colliding with her, Lapis paused.

The girl, Amber she thought the name was, looked like she wasn't even there. Her eyes were wide, her pupils huge, and she swayed from side to side. “Are you okay?” Lapis asked, reaching out to steady the girl, but she was barely acknowledged. “Hey? Anyone in there?”

Waving her hand in front of Amber's eyes seemed to catch her attention and her gaze raised enough to draw across Lapis's face. She gave a smile of recognition, mumbling something that might have been a greeting.

Lapis had a bad feeling, glancing down at the cup Amber was holding limply in one hand. Narrowing her eyes, Lapis dipped her finger into the lukewarm liquid. 

Her polish turned black.

“Dammit.” She cursed softly, “Hey, did you drive?” She tried to catch Amber's attention. It took a few tries, but she eventually got a nod and the girl produced some keys from her pocket. “Alright, let's get you out of here.” Lapis sighed, leading the girl slowly towards the front door.

It took quite some time, but Lapis eventually managed to not only lead Amber out and find her car, but also get her planted in the passenger seat. Then she headed back inside to find Jenny.

It wasn't hard to find the hostess, she was making herself available in case anyone needed anything. Lapis tugged on her jacket to get her attention, “Jenny, you have a problem!” Lapis quickly explained what she'd found, holding up her blackened polish for evidence.

“What?! Oh my gosh, girl no! I won't be having that at my party!” Jenny marched over to the set up Sour Cream had and leaned up to yell into his ear. Lapis saw his face turn grim, but became distracted when she was rammed into from behind.

Turning to glare at the offender, finding a tall, skinny guy trying to lead another drugged up girl upstairs. Lapis didn't hesitate, she grabbed a drink out of the hands of the person closest to her and dumped it right over the guy's head.

“Hey! What the hell!?” He shouted, turning to her with a scowl.

“Where the hell do you think you're going with a girl that can barely even walk?” Lapis shouted at him. Her arms went around the girl's waist, pulling her away from his grip.

The commotion drew attention, especially as the music cut off abruptly and all that could be heard in the sudden silence was Lapis's shouted words. Lapis saw Buck come to stand next to her, his presence a clear threat to the guy. 

“Buck, can you please take this girl out to Amber's car. She's the silver sedan at the end of the driveway. Me and Jenny and Kiki are going to head upstairs and make sure there's no one else drugged and being taken advantage of.” Lapis passed the girl off to her friend, turning to make sure that the twins were right behind her.

They were and Lapis lead the march up the stairs. By the time they came back downstairs, one more girl in tow, the party was starting to clear out. A couple of good Samaritans had three guys cornered, including the creep Lapis had dumped the drink on, and we're questioning them about the drugs.

“Can you get this one to the car as well? I need to find Amethyst before I go.” Lapis asked the twins, getting affirmations before she headed farther into the house.

It took a good bit of searching, so much that Lapis had begun to think that maybe Amethyst had left, but eventually Lapis found her classmate slumped over on the back porch. With a sigh, Lapis reached down and struggled to bring the girl to her feet.

What a disaster this night was.

After far too much effort, Lapis managed to exit the house with Amethyst supported over one shoulder. The height difference made it awkward, but she was determined to not leave her classmate behind. Outside, by the car, Lapis found her friends waiting for her and they helped her slide Amethyst into the, now cramped, backseat of the car.

“I think this was everyone left.” Lapis declared, leaning back against the car and running a hand through her hair tiredly. 

“We'll stay behind to clean up this mess.” Jenny said, hands on her hips. She radiated displeasure and Lapis felt for her. Jenny always threw great parties, this kind of stuff was bad for her reputation and not fun to deal with at all.

“Do you need help getting then all home?” Kiki asked worriedly.

“No, I don't even know two of them. I think I'll just take them… somewhere safe. I'll make sure they don't get into any trouble. If you don't mind leaving their cars here overnight, I'll make sure they come back and get them tomorrow morning.” Lapis explained, turning to glance through the window at the mostly passed out bunch.

“Where will you take them?” Kiki followed Lapis around the car as she dug out the keys and opened the door. “And are you okay to drive?”

“I know someone with a big house that can accommodate all of us. And yes, I've not had anything to drink tonight.” Kiki looked surprised at that, but didn't question her.

“Okay, well, be safe, text me when you get everyone settled.” Lapis agreed and started up the car.

With a sigh, she pulled her phone out and checked the time. 1:00 am. Lapis winced, hopefully Peridot was still up. She hit speed dial 1 on her phone and held it to her ear, carefully pulling into the street.

It was picked up on the second ring, “Lapis? Are you okay?”

Lapis couldn't help but smile, “Yeah, I'm fine. I just… look, something crazy kinda went down at the party and I need your help.”

“Of course, whatever you need.” Peridot's voice still sounded worried, but she was always eager to assist.

Lapis quickly explained the problem, “So they need a place to crash for the night. Can I bring them over?”

“Yeah, my mom ended up postponing her flight until Monday, so it shouldn't be a problem. I'll start getting things ready here.”

“Alright, awesome. Good to have a plan.”

“I'll let you go then. Drive safe.” There was a pause, then, “Lapis, I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Lapis responded without hesitation. 

Even after hanging up, Lapis felt lighter than she had since their fight.

_______

The drive there was uneventful. Lapis pulled up at the familiar house and found the front door opening immediately, Peridot having been waiting for her. The girls were all passed out, but the two still hesitated to be physically affectionate to each other. This was an odd situation, unprecedented, so they wordlessly fell back into their school routine, however subdued due to the situation.

One by one, they ushered the girls inside. Peridot's house had two guestrooms and the living room had two pull out couches; Lapis had never needed to use any of this, so it was a strange sight to see everything pulled out and set up for guests. Peridot had provided trash cans, glasses of water, and painkillers at each bedside and Lapis felt her heart flutter at her girlfriend's thoughtfulness. 

Once each girl was tucked in and rolled carefully onto their sides, Lapis and Peridot retired to their room. With a heavy sigh, Lapis opened the bottom drawer of the dresser and began to pull out her sleep clothes.

No sooner did she strip to her underwear, though, did she feel small arms slip around her middle. “Are you okay?” Peridot's unusually quiet voice asked.

“Yeah, I will be. It was just kinda scary.” Lapis turned in the embrace, wrapping her arms around Peridot's shoulders. The girl was just small enough that she could bury her face between Lapis's breasts, a fact that was the subject of endless jokes between them.

Now when Peri did it, it was comfortingly familiar. “Other than that, too.” Peridot said, peeking up through her eyelashes. Lapis had the urge to kiss her, “Are you okay?”

“I was just about to call you before this all went down.” Lapis explained, carding her fingers through Peridot's messy hair, “I wanted to apologize. I was unfair to you.”

“No, no! I shouldn't have gotten upset. I know how you feel about your family and everything. I was just being sensitive. So, I'm sorry, too.”

Lapis, never one to deny her urges for long, leaned down to kiss Peridot deeply. The blonde melted into the kiss, fingertips trailing lightly up Lapis's spine. After a long moment, they broke apart and Lapis was gratified to see her girlfriend was panting and flushed.

“I think I would be happy to marry you, but only if it's just an informal setting. I don't think I could ever be comfortable with a big wedding, maybe it could be just us and a judge.” Lapis explained what had been in her mind the last few days, “It's like my brain can't reconcile a traditional wedding with us. It's, like, error 404, sense not found. Did I use that right?”

Peridot pecked her on the lips, “You did and I think I understand. But, you know, you're basically describing eloping. Just sneak off and do it without telling anyone.”

“I don't think that would be so bad, honestly. It's always been just you and me, I feel like maybe it's our thing? I dunno, maybe I'm weird.” Lapis shrugged, trying to downplay her anxiety about the whole thing.

Peridot saw right through her, of course. “It _is_ our thing. You and me against the world. I don’t think I mind eloping, either, I just wanna be with you.” She blushed for a different reason, “In whatever capacity you’re comfortable with.”

Lapis chose her words carefully, “I think this is a subject worth talking about later.” She said, deliberately slow, making sure she was making herself clear, before speaking with her usual speed. “We’ve just reconciled after a big fight and we’re currently dealing with a crisis. I think talk of our future together can wait a few more days. For now, we’ll just have to agree that there is one.”

Giving her a grateful smile, Peridot nodded, “Yes, agreed. Why don't we head to bed then and deal with everything in the morning? You've had a long night.”

That sounded like the best plan at the moment, so Lapis allowed her girlfriend to lead her to their bed. Wanting to be as close to each other as possible, Peridot laid down in the middle and Lapis crawled to lay face down on top of her. 

They'd probably shift away later, but for now they just enjoyed the closeness. Lapis was still in her underwear, Peridot was wearing a soft shirt, the door was decidedly locked. They had no need to hide here. Peridot began stroking her back again and Lapis felt the remaining tension drain from her body.

They exchanged 'I love you’s and drifted off to sleep.

_______

The next morning found the two trudging sleepily into the kitchen, discussing what they were going to do for breakfast.

“I'll cook if you make coffee, how about that?” Peridot tried to concede, bringing her bargain down from making everything.

“No way, I'm imposing on you, I should be making breakfast.” Lapis put her hands on her hips, trying to argue quietly, aware of the girls sleeping in the next room.

“But you've also had a rough night. Will you just let me do this, you stubborn butt?” Peridot sighed, turning around the corner of the center counter and heading for the fridge.

“Peridot.” A new voice, timbre low and intimidating, spoke up from the dining room. Both girls jumped, instinctual terror shooting through both their hearts.

“Mother!” Peridot exclaimed, forgetting to keep her voice down. She quickly lowered herself to a frantic whisper, “You're home early.”

“I ended up catching an earlier flight.” She explained, waving her hand dismissively, “And a good thing I did, otherwise I'd never have known that you were throwing drug parties in my home.”

Lapis and Peridot both hastened to correct her, speaking over each other in a clash of voices. After a moment of jumbled words, they shared a glance and silently communicated for a moment. Then Peridot said, “No, mother, it isn't like that.”

“Then what reason is there for there to be four passed out young ladies in my home.” Lapis flinched at the way she emphasized that it was her residence, as though trying to remind her that she didn't belong here.

“It's my fault, Ms. Diamond.” Lapis picked up when Peridot started to stutter, “I was at a party last night and things got bad. I didn't know where else to take them so-”

“So I volunteered our house!” Peridot cut in, unwilling to let Lapis take all the blame. “Since it has more room and is arguably safer for our classmates.”

The girlfriends exchanged another glance, Lapis grateful, Peridot worried, then turned nervously back to Ms. Diamond. The woman hummed thoughtfully, somehow managing to make even that sound threatening. 

“I want them gone by noon, Peridot.” She ordered, standing swiftly, “I'll be in my study, don't disturb me.”

“Yes, ma'am, we'll have them out of here as soon as possible.” Peridot was quick to reassure.

They watched silently as her mother rose and swept out of the room exuding power and authority. Lapis had always compared her to an army general, taking command of people as easily as she commanded a room. It was never fun being on the wrong side of that.

When they felt they could breathe again, Lapis and Peridot shared another glance. “So. Breakfast. Wanna split duties?”

Peridot, obviously stressed over the brief encounter with her parental unit, nodded weakly, “I'll take eggs and toast, you get bacon. Make the coffee strong.”

Still a little shaken, it took them a few minutes to find their rhythm. Soon enough, they were gliding around each other, mostly silent, except for a few instructions or offers of help. They didn't even notice they had an audience until a familiar voice spoke up from the kitchen door.

“I thought you guys hated each other.” Both girls jumped, Lapis hissing when bacon grease spit against her skin. They turned to find Amethyst, looking worse for wear, leaning against the door frame.

Exchanging a glance, Peridot indicated that she could handle food and Lapis nodded, coming over to help Amethyst into a seat. “Hate's a strong word.” Lapis defended, “Some things are more important than our rivalry and this happens to be one of those things.”

“How're you feeling?” Peridot asked, scooping the pan of scrambled eggs into a huge bowl. Once that was set down on a cool burner, she turned to the sizzling bacon.

“Like my brain got hit by a truck and tossed back into my skull sideways. Oh and also like I swallowed a desert.” Amethyst groaned, slumping over the table.

“Did you take the medicine and drink the water Peridot left out for you?” Lapis asked, sounding surprisingly motherly.

“No, honestly everything is so bleary I didn't even notice.” Amethyst's response made Lapis click her tongue and march out of the room to get the items in question. She came back a moment later and thrust the glass into Amethyst's hands.

“Take meds, then drink. Slowly! You might make yourself sick.” At the stove, Peridot chuckled at her, focused on scooping the bacon onto a paper towel covered plate.

“Jeez Lazuli, you sound like her mom.” She commented, not looking at either of them.

“Yeah, Lap, this is a new side to you.” Amethyst gave a crooked smile, not quite able to reach her usual exuberance, “You gonna pack my lunch, too?”

“Shut up the both of you or I'll put you on dish duty.” She threatened, eliciting protests from all sides.

“What, no, I'm sick, pity me.”

“This is my house and I did half the cooking!”

“Why is everyone so loud this early?” Came a new voice and the three looked up to find the rest of their guests shuffling into the room.

Peridot, easily the most socially awkward and never used to being nice, clammed up in the face of so many strangers. She hurriedly turned to set out plates and food on the large counter while Lapis made sure everyone took medicine and drank water.

After everyone was settled and food and coffee passed out, Amethyst finally asked, “So, what happened last night?”

Lapis sighed, “You guys were all drugged. Someone roofied a bunch of drinks. Luckily I think we got everyone effected out safely before anything bad happened.”

“How did we end up here?” Amber mumbled around the rim of her mug.

“I borrowed your car and Peridot volunteered her house for recovery.” Lapis said nonchalantly, hoping no one would press.

Amethyst, never one to take a hint, went on, “I don't remember Peri being there. I didn't even think you did parties.”

“I don't. I just happened to be around at the time.” Peridot shrugged, looking uncomfortable at the line of questioning.

“At one in the morning? What, were you burglarizing a house? Having a secret rendezvous? Were you secretly at the party in disguise?” Amethyst laughed, ignoring Peridot's glare.

“....Yes.” Peridot finally said, falling into a grumpy silence as she grabbed up her empty plate and took it to the sink.

“Lay off, Amethyst, even the nerd can have her secrets.” Lapis defended, trying not to look as tense as she felt.

Amethyst looked ready to protest, but Peridot came back and glared at her hotly, “Listen here, you nosy gossip, my reasons are my own. Just be lucky I even offered and I'm not gonna make you walk back to your house later or put your big mouth out on my lawn.”

“Alright, jeez, you don't have to be mean about it.” Amethyst held up her hands in surrender, “I was just wondering.”

Peridot plopped down in her seat with a pout, arms crossed petulantly. Silence fell over the kitchen in an awkward wave.

Lapis, unable to take the tension anymore, sighed, “Wow, Perijerk, you certainly know how to liven up a room.”

“Yeah? At least my face doesn't automatically darken one, emo band.” Peridot huffed, but Lapis saw the tension lessen in her shoulders.

“Better to darken the room than have to even look at your face, four eyes.” Lapis shot back and Peridot turned towards her, leaning forward eagerly.

Before she could give her comeback, Amethyst cried out, “Alright! No more fighting, mom and dad.” Lapis saw Peridot flush and figured from the heat in her own cheeks, she probably looked the same. “Don't you guys get enough of that at school?”

“Not really, gotta be mean to someone that deserves it.” Lapis shrugged, watching Peridot huff.

“Agreed.” She said simply, “Now, if everyone is feeling better, kindly get out of my house.” There was a chorus of groans and Peridot raised her voice over them, “I mean it, it's almost eleven and I need to get this place cleaned by noon. Get out already.”

Everyone rose from the counter and began shuffling towards the door. Lapis handed keys over to Amber, who offered to take everyone back to the party to get their cars. 

Amethyst paused before leaving, the three standing on the small porch together, “Hey, I can stay and help out if you want. You were really nice to let us stay.” 

Peridot waved her off, “No, you were sick, I'll simply commandeer Lazuli to help clean up. She helped make the mess, after all.”

Lapis pretended to be disgruntled, “Hey, don't I get a say I this?”

“That's the commandeering part, Lazuli.” Peridot grinned smugly.

“Are you sure you two should be left alone? I don't want to hear about a murder later today.” Amethyst laughed nervously.

“We'll be fine, I only need her for an hour. We deal with each other far longer in school.” Looking quite pleased, Peridot planted her hands on her hips.

“Just last week you two had a fight two minutes into last period.” Amethyst pointed out dryly.

“Yeah and that was Lazuli's fault.” Peridot shot back simply. Lapis shoved her off the porch stoop. “Hey!”

“Oops.” Lapis smirked.

“This is what I mean. You guys can't help going at each other.” Amethyst sighed, “And, honestly, if you're going to fight, I'd love to see it, ha!”

“Amethyst?” Peridot said dryly.

“Yeah?”

“Get off my lawn.”

Amethyst laughed good naturedly and headed off towards Amber's car, “I'll see you guys at school!”

________

The weekend ended in a blur. Lapis wasn't able to stay at Peridot's house due to her mother being home, so they settled for long phone calls and video chatting. They often fell asleep while on call with each other and whoever woke up first got to watch the other sleep. Lapis thought this was what being in a long distance relationship might be like, but the idea of having to do this during college was painful, so she contented herself with reminders that they'd see each other at school.

At school things were getting lively because it was time to fulfill Lapis's lost bet. Technically, it should have happened the week before, but between Lapis's lack of money and the fight they had, it had been pushed back. 

As it was, Peridot was still buying the lunch, it was just Lapis's job to deliver it to her. 

Peridot grumbled as she sat in the corner of the lunchroom, piled high on a throne made of stacked chairs. She couldn't even reach the table at this height. On her head sat a ridiculous plastic crown and around her shoulders was a red and white, fur lined cape.

Gathered around the table were a few spectators, curious at the inevitable scene. Lapis stood off to the side, holding a silver platter, complete with cover, aloft. Atop her head was an oversized jester hat that kept falling in her face.The bells jingled with every movement she made.

“Ladies and gentlemen!” She called out, tone flat, but voice carrying, “Presenting to her highness, Queen Peributt the first, a gourmet meal of chicken tenders and fries!”

Peridot, uncomfortable at the height, simply glowered down at Lapis, “Uncover it for me, jester!” She called down, “And then get me down from here!”

There was a smattering of laughter and applause, Lapis giving a little grin and a sarcastic bow, “As you wish, my Queen.” The lid was lifted with flourish, then Lapis made her way around the table and helped Peridot off the wobbly stack of chairs.

Feeling much better on lower, solid ground, Peridot grinned and did a royal wave to the spectators. “You gonna provide entertainment, too, or is the costume just for show?”

“I thought about a juggling act that just consisted of me bouncing oranges off your head, but I thought you might really fight me if I did that.” Lapis chuckled, feeling gratified at Peridot's giggling.

Normally they sat apart from each other at lunch, but they decided that this week was a good excuse to sit together. Certainly the fact that Peridot ate alone made it more imperative to try.

Taking a seat across from each other, they tried to act unaffected by the unusual circumstance, but Peridot couldn't stop grinning and Lapis was doing her little snort laugh that indicated she was truly pleased. Then a tray sitting down next to Lapis snapped them back to reality.

“Hey, you guys seem to be having fun. For once.” Amethyst said, settling in the seat.

Flabbergasted, the girlfriends exchanged a look. Lapis adopted her normally droll look and Peridot hurried to recover.

“I was just telling Lazuli that her jester hat is perfect, since she's such a clown all the time.” Peridot puffed up her chest smugly.

“Yeah, I'm a natural riot.” Lapis responded, voice drier than the desert.

Amethyst cackled and Peridot snickered, “You should have prepared for this, Lazuli, I demand dancing tomorrow.”

“I'll dance on your grave if you aren't careful, squirt.” Lapis squinted at Peridot in a half hearted glare.

“You guys should come sit with us.” Amethyst invited, gesturing over to the table holding Garnet and Pearl. 

Lapis and Peridot both made a strikingly similar face of disgust, “Yeah, me and Pearl don't really get along.” Lapis shrugged, downplaying her dislike of the other girl.

They'd gotten into it in freshman year and Lapis held a grudge. 

“We work well together, but we haven't talked much since she nearly punched me in engie club.” Peridot revealed.

“You were kind of a jerk.” Lapis quipped.

“I'm always a jerk. So are you. These are just facts, Lazuli.” 

“Aww, come on, guys. No time like the present to bury the hatchet.” Amethyst cut in before more banter could take place.

“I mean, I'm game, but I'm fairly certain Lizzy Borden over here might wanna do something else when it comes to Pearl.” Peridot giggled.

Lapis shrugged. She'd gotten too bitter about the things she and Pearl had said to each other. On top of that, Garnet, with her eerily calm demeanor, kind of weirded her out. “I'll pass, but if you're taking my entertainment away then I'll just go sit with my friends.”

She caught Peridot's eyes across the table and tried to convey her apology. They were kinda trapped here and not even for Peri would Lapis endure a lunch period next to Pearl.

“Hey, half a success is still good in my book. Coming Per?” Amethyst called and Lapis felt a surge of jealousy at the casual nickname use.

Peridot shrugged and hopped up, “Don't forget, Laz, the jester hat lasts throughout lunch.” She said, parting with a discreet stroke up Lapis's spine. 

Lapis watched with a carefully blank expression as Peridot followed Amethyst over to the table, both being greeted and even welcomed. Despite herself, a dark cloud formed around Lapis's heart, sending an unpleasant storm of feelings through her.

_________

Every day after that, Peridot sat with the three girls and Lapis felt that terrible darkness trying to devour her from the inside out. She knew she was being stupid, but she really couldn't help herself.

She tried to ignore it, tried to push it from her mind, but it didn't help that the two of them were still stuck with just video calls all night. Lapis felt like this was a conversation to be having face to face, where Peridot could hold her and comfort her. Unfortunately, that just wasn't possible, so Lapis was left to suffer.

Peridot's mother was home for a full two weeks before her next assignment took her away from the house again. She'd be gone until after the new year and Lapis was happy for that because her parents were due to be back for the upcoming winter holidays. 

By the time Lapis was entering Peridot's room on the Friday after school the day her mother left, there was a desperate need for her to mark her claim on her girlfriend.

They barely made it in the door before Lapis was slamming Peridot against it and kissing her like they'd been apart years instead of weeks.

Peridot was moaning immediately, opening herself up to the assault, and Lapis took advantage of that and their height difference to plunder Peridot's mouth sloppily. Hands fisted in the material of Peridot’s top and a knee was shoved between her legs.

Something was off; even at her most wound up Lapis never acted like this. She could tell that Peridot realized this as well because, after a few moments of messy kissing, she struggled to pull away. “Wait, Lapis…” Lapis wasn't interested in stopping, though, and kissed her way down Peridot's neck, “Just, hold on a-ow!”

Peridot threw herself to the side, clapping a hand to her throat and looking shocked, “What the…. You bit me!”

“Sorry.” Lapis shrugged half heartedly, trying to pull Peridot back in, “I'll be more careful. Now, come on.”

“No, wait.” Lapis refused to listen, grabbing Peridot by the upper arm and tugging hard. “Red light!” She cried out and Lapis froze. 

In all the time they'd been together, their safe word had only been used four times. All had been at moments when pain crossed the threshold of arousing and into unpleasant. Never had they needed to stop before even getting started.

Lapis felt hurt and a little angry, but to ignore the sanctity of the safe word was unforgivable. She let Peridot go and took a step back.

“What's wrong?” Peridot asked, voice soft. “You're never like this.”

“I just missed you.” Lapis shrugged half heartedly, “I just wanna be with you.”

“We've been apart before and you were never so… forceful.” Peridot shivered, “It's just not like you.”

“But you like it.” Lapis pointed out and watched Peridot's face turn red.

“I do, a lot, but you never want to hurt me. Laz, just talk to me.” Peridot pleaded, reaching out to rub Lapis's shoulders.

“I don't want to talk.” Lapis said petulantly, “I just wanna fuck you.”

She could see the instant effect the words had on Peridot. Her pupils got huge, her breath hitched, and her face flushed deeper. Lapis let a smile twitch at her lips; what a kinky girl.

“As…” Peridot visibly struggled with her words, “Much as I'd like that, I feel like maybe something is wrong?”

Lapis huffed, “Don't you want me?” She tried, leaning in and nuzzling her girlfriend's neck. Why couldn't she just give in? They both wanted this.

Peridot sighed, “Every day. For the rest of my life. That's why I can't do this. You're hurting, Lapis, and you're trying to take it out on me. This isn't mutual, not like my bad days, we should sit down.”

Her words were like a bucket of cold water and Lapis had to step away, blinking hard. Why did Peridot always have a way of making her feel? She allowed herself to be lead over to the love seat, falling into her usual spot with her heart and eyes burning. 

“Baby,” cooed Peridot, “Just tell me what's wrong. You know I'll do my best to help.”

Lapis burst into tears.

“H-Hey now.” Peridot stumbled over her words in surprise, hands coming hesitantly up to rest on Lapis's shoulders. “It'll be okay.” She whispered, slowly pulling Lapis closer until she could drop her forehead on Peridot's chest.

“I'm just so… so messed up!” Lapis sobbed, reaching around to grip the back of Peridot's shirt desperately. She felt a shiver run through her girlfriend when her nails dug in through the fabric, which normally would have amused her, but now only reminded her of the scars that laid on the otherwise smooth skin.

“That's not a bad thing.” Peridot tried to comfort. She shifted until they were both in a more comfortable position, where Lapis didn't have to hunch over. “So what if your head gets all out of sorts sometimes. That's not uncommon and it doesn't mean you're bad.”

“But I am.” Lapis whimpered, thinking of her jealousy at Peridot making friends and how hard she'd gripped her girlfriend's arm, “I'm no good for you. I'll only bring you down with me.”

“No, no, baby, no.” Peridot hushed her gently, carding her fingers through Lapis's hair, “You've got it all wrong. And you seem to be forgetting that I'm messed up, too, just in a different way.” Peridot cupped her cheeks and lifted her face until she could look into Lapis's watery blue eyes, “Furthermore, you've got everything backwards. You're not going to bring me down and you're not bad for me; you encourage me, you support me.”

They shifted around until Peridot could slide into Lapis's lap and they were mostly eye to eye, “Ever since I met you, since I started dating you, I've become stronger. You say you're no good for me, but, baby, I'm good because of you.” 

Lapis sobbed and shook her head, heart feeling like it was being squeezed in her chest. “I'm jealous.” She whimpered out, “I want you to myself, I want to possess you.” The confession hurt to get out, but she kept going, “I feel like I want you to depend on only me and I know it's not healthy, but its how I feel.”

Peridot sighed, rubbing Lapis's back and stroking her hair, “I get jealous, too, you know?” She said softly, “The parties and your cool friends and even your swim team. It's hard not to be angry when you spend time away from me. And you're right, it's not healthy, but at least we both know that. That means we can work through it.”

“How many times are we gonna have to work through it, though?” Lapis sniffled, “How long will it take for unhealthy feelings to just stop it!?”

“As many times and as long as it takes.” Peridot sighed and they fell into an uneasy silence. Lapis sniffed every few moments and Peridot sighed and they stayed wrapped around each other.

Until Lapis said, “We should break up.”

“No.” Came the immediate answer.

“You should leave me.”

“That's not gonna happen.”

“You should break up with me.”

“I refuse.” Peridot gripped Lapis harder, “And stop thinking that. Nothing is gonna make that happen.”

“What if…” Lapis hummed, “I cheated?”

“No, because now I know you'd do it just to make me mad.” Peridot indulged her.

“What if I hit you?” This one came quieter.

“I'd hit you back.” Peridot thought for a moment, “Or give the safe word.”

Despite herself, Lapis gave an amused huff, “What if…” her mirth dropped off quite suddenly. “I just stopped talking to you?”

Peridot swallowed hard; out of all the scenarios, this was the most likely to happen and Peridot had a feeling she'd be eating her words later. Still, she said, “I'd never give up on you.”

Lapis fell silent after that and they lay together on the couch. When Peridot woke up hours later, Lapis was gone.


	4. Parad-ice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life moves forward. You can either stay with it or be left in the dust.

Peridot sighed, laying on her stomach on her bed, a textbook open in front of her. At her side was Amethyst in a similar pose, scribbling down some answers for their homework.

It had been two weeks since her confrontation with Lapis and it was the most miserable she'd ever been in her life. Lapis was ignoring her texts and phone calls, refused to speak to her in class, and hadn't even been meeting with Steven after school. Her excuse for that was swim practice, since their first competition was coming up this weekend, but still, the avoidance hurt.

Peridot tried to be patient, never her strong suit, but she really had no choice except to pretend she wasn't being torn apart inside. To that end, she'd started accepting Amethyst's offers to hang out. 

It had started with Lapis's lost bet week, since Amethyst had invited Peridot to sit with her at lunch. The two got along surprisingly well, but since Peri normally spent time with Lapis after school, she'd never accepted Amethyst's requests for more time together.

Now, though, she didn't have an excuse. So, Amethyst had taken to following her home. Peridot couldn't say that she minded, the girl was a good distraction, but she missed Lapis and it was hard to pretend she didn't.

A hand on her back made her jump, electricity shooting to her groin at even the lightest touch. Peridot threw herself onto her back, knocking Amethyst's hand away, “Please don't touch my back.” She grumbled, face flushed. Damn her strange erogenous zones.

Amethyst laughed, flopping over to mimic Peridot's pose. “Dang, P-dot, sensitive much?”

“You have no idea.” Peridot grumbled, clasping her hands over her stomach. “Are you finished with your homework?”

“Yeah, and it looked like you were trying to burn a hole through your textbook. You alright?” Amethyst rolled onto her side, head propped up by her hand.

Peridot sighed, glancing at her friend from the corner of her eye. “I'm simply lamenting the fact that human beings are so complicated. And that sometimes… people just aren't okay.”

A hand covered hers on her stomach and Peridot turned her head in surprise. Had Amethyst been that close before?

“Sometimes it's okay to take comfort in someone else.” Amethyst whispered and alarm bells went off in Peridot's head.

“That's… also what I believe…” she said hesitantly, unsure at the sudden change in atmosphere. Something was happening and she didn't know what to expect.

Then Amethyst began to lean in, eyes fluttering closed, and it hit Peridot like a brick. She squeaked and turned her head frantically away, feeling lips land against her cheek. She sat up, turning to look down at her friend, “I'm sorry!” She cried, seeing hurt cross Amethyst's face. 

“Don't.” Amethyst sat up as well, arms around her waist self consciously.

“No, I-I’m really sorry. I didn't mean to make you think…” Peridot sighed, “You're great, really, but I'm spoken for.”

“You don't have to lie.” Amethyst snapped and, even though she was hurt, Peridot couldn't help feeling offended, “If you don't want me, just say it.”

“No, really, I have a girlfriend.” Peridot said, voice a little drier than she intended.

“Really?” Amethyst asked skeptically. When Peridot just nodded, her face changed to disbelief, “Really?” She asked again, voice going higher.

“Yes.”

“You? Have a girlfriend?”

“Don't be rude.” Peridot grumbled, slumping her shoulders in annoyance.

“No, no, I don't mean it like that. I mean, I'm interested in you, so I believe you got game, but I just mean that I've never seen you with anyone. I didn't even think you really had other friends.” Amethyst leaned her elbows on her knees, looking at Peridot searchingly.

“We kinda keep it under wraps.” Peridot shrugged, “And, right now, we're kinda… fighting? I don't know.” She flopped down against her pillows, “She's got some serious depression and it's always making her feel like she's not good enough. So she's doing this thing where she's trying to push me away.”

“Does that happen often?” Amethyst asked, brows furrowed.

“Not terribly, perhaps four times a year. These kinds of episodes usually don't even last that long, only a few days. However, I've been increasingly worried because it has been two weeks now and she still won't talk to me.” Sighing, Peridot ran her hands through her hair.

“That sounds… annoying.” Amethyst huffed.

“It can be, but only because it's hard for me to be patient. She's worth all the reassurance that I can give her and she's worth waiting for. That doesn't mean that it's easy, even after all this time. She knows she has a problem, as well, but her parents just believe in praying it all away.”

“Is she really worth it? This seems like a lot of trouble.” Peridot wanted to feel insulted, but she was suddenly just _so_ tired.

“Relationships aren't easy.” She said, feeling tears sting her eyes, “Especially if one or both parties have some form of mental illness. We made a commitment to each other, though, and I'm not willing to let her go yet. I'll fight for her, just like I know she'd fight for me.” Something suddenly struck her and she sat up straight as her brainstorm overcame her, tears disappearing as determination swelled in her chest, “Yeah,” She said slowly in her ‘Eureka’ moment, “Yeah! I'll fight for her. I think she's had enough time alone and I know just how to do it.”

________

Lapis wasn't human. She was a robot, programmed to make it through her day, take notes, do homework, and practice swimming. Ever since she snuck away from Peridot's house in the middle of the night, she'd shut herself down in order to go through with her plan.

Stay away from Peridot until the end of school, then fade into obscurity. Then maybe die, she wasn't sure about that part yet.

She'd somehow managed to make it all the way through these weeks without faltering, although she couldn't have honestly told you anything she did, and now it was almost time for her swimming competition.

Since it was an indoor sport, they held it all year and the culmination of the months of practice was a competition just before winter break. It wasn't hosted in Beach City, they had to travel about two hours by bus one state over to a much bigger school, which just allowed Lapis more time to zone out. She was barely even aware when they arrived, following the flow as everyone piled out of the bus.

She knew the routine; go in, sign up, change, wait around, qualifying rounds, numbers assigned, then the competition itself. She'd been doing this since freshman year, it was no big deal. 

The only pause came when she was changing into her swimsuit. On her chest, just above her breast, she could just make out the imprint of sharp teeth. She had no recent bruises, since she hadn't been with Peridot in over a month, but the scar from the worst bite she'd ever inflicted was still visible, even a year after it had happened.

Lapis nearly smiled as she traced her fingers over the mark. It had bled like nobody's business and they'd panicked. Lapis hadn't even used the safe word before Peridot was springing off her and darting around to find the first aid kit.

They'd never have moments like that again.

Frowning now, Lapis pulled the strap of her swimsuit the rest of the way up, neatly covering her scar. She'd just have to get used to that, this was her fault, after all. No, she couldn't think, if she did, she'd never get through this competition. Time for regret could happen when she was alone in bed.

For now, she was a robot.

_____ 

After the qualifying rounds were done, the audience was allowed to file in. It was a lively bunch, Lapis could hear them even from inside the locker room. She sat on a bench, her team talking excitedly around her, and tried to look like she was paying attention. She was waiting for her name to be called so she could go out and swim.

Normally, the teams would all be out by the pool, but there was so many people here today that they had to limit the competitors to just those competing and those on standby. So they waited and amused themselves.

Finally, Lapis heard her coach calling her for standby, and she let herself be lead out to the pool. She sat on the cold bleachers and watched the other competitors glide through the water in front of her. She zeroed in on her teammate, nodding approvingly as she pulled out into second place. 

Points were awarded, the pool was cleared, and then the next race was announced. One by one, the competitors were called up, Lapis calmly waiting for her name amidst the polite cheering.

“From Beach City High, number 43, Lapis Lazuli!” Lapis expected the same polite cheering as she stood, intending to take her place. Instead, what she heard was a loud screech.

“LAPIS! LAZULI! L-A-P I-S-L A-Z-U L-I-HEY!” Stunned, Lapis whipped her head around to stare in disbelief into the stands.

There, at the top, was Peridot, a huge flag with Lapis's name on it jutting up from her back. In her hands were dark blue pompoms and she was wearing a swim team shirt with Lapis's name down the arm. Even her normally blonde hair was sprayed sloppily with blue dye.

As Lapis watched, she shook the pompoms wildly, chanting at the top of her lungs, “LAPIS, LAPIS, SHE'S OUR MAN! IF SHE CAN'T DO IT, NO ONE CAN!” The people around her began scooting away in annoyance and fear, “LAPIS, LAPIS, SHE'S REAL DUMB, YOU BETTER WIN YOU STUPID JERK BECAUSE I LOOK TERRIBLE IN BLUE!”

Lapis couldn't believe her eyes, it felt like she'd fallen into an alternate universe. She'd been so consumed by her own depression that she'd completely forgotten about the lost bet. Peridot obviously hadn't and, even though Lapis had been ignoring her girlfriend for so long, she still came to cheer her on.

“LAPIS, LAPIS, I'M HERE FOR YOU! I MAY HAVE LOST, BUT YOU'VE YET TO! LAPIS, LAPIS, I'M NOT GONNA QUIT! A PROMISE IS A PROMISE, DON'T YOU FORGET! LAPIS, LAPIS, JUST A JUDGE IS FINE! YOUR IDEA IS AS GOOD AS MINE!” Peridot continued to scream, easily drowning out any other noise, especially as everyone began to quiet at the spectacle.

Lapis couldn’t help feeling touched, her emotions nearly choking her with a lump in her throat. The stupid rhymes, the support, the willingness to endure public humiliation; Lapis was filled with understanding. Peridot’s message was coming through loud and clear, despite the over the top delivery.

What did she expect, though, since Lapis was being just as ridiculous?

“LAPIS, LAPIS, I'M ALL OUT OF CHEERS! NOW GET IN THAT POOL AND BEAT ALL THEIR REARS!” Peridot raised the pompoms high and shook them wildly.

As overwhelmingly sweet as the whole thing was, Lapis just had to burst out laughing; she couldn’t help it. She doubled over, clutching her stomach, tears coming to her eyes. She laughed until her throat hurt and until she nearly stumbled into the pool. She laughed to hide her crying, wanting nothing more than to run into the stands and kiss her stupid girlfriend senseless.

Finally getting herself under control, Lapis straightened and wiped her eyes, “Sit down, you asshole!” She called, grinning widely, “You made your point already!”

Peridot gave her a silly salute, then dropped down onto the bleachers, satisfied. Lapis made her way to her place, still grinning, as the announcers hesitantly resumed calling the competitors up.

Lapis won every race that night, easily able to pick up Peridot cheering for her at a more respectable volume.

_______ 

After the swim competition, there was only another three days before school let out for break; they wouldn’t reconvene until after the new year. News of Peridot's spectacle spread like wildfire and quickly became the thing of legends. It certainly helped that the blue hair lasted six washes until it was fully gone.

Lapis's parents came home five days before Christmas. Lapis did her level best to avoid any festivities, but she still got roped into going to church almost every night. She decided that was a small price to pay for taking three boxes of silver, jewelry, and crystal to a pawn ship to trade in for a small golden ring with a tiny lapis lazuli embedded in it, but she still chafed at the forced interactions. 

Every night, as retribution for her parent’s stifling behavior, Lapis would sneak out and make her way to Peridot's. They'd have sex with a different toy each time, Peridot’s idea, surprisingly enough, as a way to help Lapis relax and try to cheer her up. Religious holidays were always difficult with parents who were probably over the borderline of fanaticism, and refusal to cooperate usually only ended in an agonizing lecture about proper worship. As the week wore on, Lapis’s nerves grew thin.

On Christmas, after a way too long Mass and a nasty argument about her apathetic attitude, Lapis stormed into her girlfriend’s room and told Peridot to fuck her until she couldn't walk. They managed to reach a new record for orgasms that night, which turned it from a terrible holiday to the best one yet.

Luckily, her parents were leaving again a few days after Christmas and things could finally get back to normal.

Since Peridot didn't celebrate any holidays, despite being Jewish, Lapis decided to wait until New Year's Eve to present her gift to her girlfriend. They’d been planning to do something together for the celebration this year, since normally Lapis went to a Jenny party and Peridot stayed home like it was any other day. With the stress of Christmas still nipping at their heels, they’d agreed to attempt to have more fun than simply staying home cuddling and watching reruns.

Peridot stole a bottle of wine from her mother's liquor cabinet and they drank the whole thing before venturing outside to try and find something fun to do together. It was late enough that no one was out, but still early enough that they'd miss the crowds waiting for fireworks.

A few blocks from the boardwalk was an old bowling alley and Lapis's eyes lit up a they passed it. “Here.” She said and Peridot barely hesitated before pulling out some bobby pins and starting to pick the lock.

“This is a bad idea.” She said, just before the lock clicked open and Lapis felt her panties grow damp at the absolute badass her nerd secretly was.

“Yeah, we'll blame the alcohol tomorrow.” Both girls had frequented this place enough during open hours, between school functions and teenage birthday parties, to know that there were no cameras around, so they waltzed inside like they owned the place.

A quick search found some lights and they fiddled with the lane controls until Peridot searched for instructions on her phone. Lapis did her best to distract her girlfriend with kisses, which worked, so they made out on one of the hard plastic benches until Lapis complained about the pain in her hip from the angle.

Then they got a lane working and spent the next hour failing at bowling like they didn't even understand the concept of the game. It was the most fun they'd had in public together in ages. They only stopped playing so that Peridot could press Lapis into the wall and finger her to a shuddering orgasm.

Then they hastily cleaned up their mess and hoped nobody would notice a few pins out of place or the unlocked door and made their way down to the beach. 

It was cold; Peridot gave Lapis her jacket, scolding her for wearing a too thin dress, even though she admitted that it looked fabulous on her. They took a long way down to the boardwalk, avoiding the growing throng of people, then slipped under the long pier to have some time to themselves.

They had another hour before the fireworks, so they settled together on the sand, nestled back where the boardwalk met the pier, hidden from any prying eyes. Even though their buzz was wearing off at this point, they still kissed like they were drunk and reckless.

Lapis pulled Peridot to sit reclining in her lap, her back to Lapis's front. Lapis took the time to kiss every inch of Peridot's throat, pulling aside the collar of her shirt to press her lips to Peridot's shoulders as well.

“Bite me, mark me, I want everyone to know I'm taken.” Peridot begged and Lapis obliged, sucking bruises into her fair skin. She didn't have a single thought of being found out, neither of them cared in that moment, and Lapis liked the way Peridot would arch and moan. She brought her hands up to cup her girlfriend's chest, giving her more reason to bow.

Lapis slid her hand lower, opening up Peridot's jeans so she could push her fingers down between spread legs and bury them in hot wetness. Peridot was more than ready for her, so Lapis didn't waste time teasing. She sunk her two middle fingers inside and curled them, rubbing the heel of her palm against a swollen and sensitive bud.

Peridot came with a broken gasp, cutting off a loud cry by only the barest margins and then slumped backwards against Lapis. Lapis pulled her fingers free and licked them clean, giggling when Peridot lazily stuck her tongue out and flicked it half heartedly against her knuckles.

Wiping the rest of the wetness against her dress, Lapis dug out her phone to check the time. Five minutes to midnight, perfect. When Peridot leaned forward to fix her clothing, Lapis reached into her other pocket and pulled out a small envelope. 

She waited until Peridot was settled back against her again and they'd exchanged a few more light kisses, before opening the envelope. She grabbed her girlfriend's wrist and directed her hand to lay flat, palm up, then dumped the contents of the envelope into her hand.

Peridot gasped when she realized what she was holding, staring in awe at the golden ring with the blue stone inlaid. “Lapis?”

“Marry me.” Lapis breathed in her ear. “No more indecision, no more pushing you away. Be mine, I'll be yours, hopefully forever.”

Peridot slipped the ring onto her left hand and leaned back to kiss Lapis with all the love in her heart. Above them, fireworks went off, signaling another new year.

______

The marks hadn't faded from Peridot's neck by the time they came back to school and it quickly became the hottest gossip. Lapis was proud of the speculation, though she didn't appreciate anyone insinuating that her nerd didn't have any game. She was quick to shut down any jokes of the sort with a flat, unamused look.

Peridot did her best to seem unaffected by the sudden attention, but Lapis realized better when they’d get home from school and she was being bent over the nearest steady surface. The two rarely ever fucked outside of Peridot's room, but for a week straight, Lapis's face got very acquainted with the couch cushions.

Finally, after the novelty wore off, they moved their activities back to the privacy of Peri's room and Lapis gave into the request to keep at least one mark visible at all times. 

Peridot had taken to keeping her ring on a chain around her neck; it was a little big and she was worried about losing it before they could get it resized. She fiddled with it a lot and usually smiled when she did, but Lapis could quickly see it becoming a habit.

The thought made her proud.

The only time things ever got awkward was when Steven asked about it, both the hickey and the ring. 

“Where did you get that pretty ring from?” He asked, seemingly out of the blue, and Lapis looked up to find Peridot blushing, the ring clasped between her fingers.

“Uh, it was a gift.” She said, quickly, “for New Years.”

“Oh.” Steven replied and, for a moment, they thought that would be it. Then he said, “What kind of stone is that? It looks familiar.”

And they can't tell him, of course, because that's way too obvious, so Peridot just shrugged, “I dunno.”

“Oh.” Steven replied again and, this time, they waited. Sure enough, a moment later he asked, “Why do you have a bruise on your neck?”

Peridot nearly choked and Lapis couldn't help but laugh. “She's dating a vampire.” Lapis revealed with a grin. Peridot smacked her, but they were both laughing.

Steven looked confused, he felt like he'd missed the joke, but it suddenly didn't seem right to ask. He decided not to.

_______

Peridot started taking music lessons with Steven's dad. She met with him every day after school and she made a spare key for Lapis so that she could still go straight to Peridot's house. They didn't realize how intimate this would be until Peridot came home to find Lapis in the kitchen, cooking dinner. She greeted her like all the sitcom dreams they’d jokingly talked about until they wanted like an ache.

Neither girl was sure whether they should be turned on or touched. The first time, they settled on touched and made a dozen jokes about a televised life. The next time it happened, Lapis nearly burned dinner because Peridot was overcome by the other emotion.

The third time, Peridot came home with flowers and it was her turn to be bent over something and fucked silly.

They fell into a routine more quickly than they could imagine. 

They were happy.

________

Both realized that things couldn’t stay the same forever. 

Their anniversary fell during Spring Break that year and that was when they decided to tie the knot. They’d both be eighteen at that time, so no one could stop them and it was just easier to only have to remember one date, anyway.

Peridot started squirreling away money, pulling from her allowance and taking a few odd jobs with tech support and programming. She bought a ring that mirrored the one Lapis gave her, except with a peridot instead of a lapis lazuli. It was simple, but Peridot liked it that way, matching rings had a kind of symmetrical poetry that she enjoyed. 

The second half of the school year focused on getting them into college, so everyone in their year was in a frenzy of applications. Peridot took prep classes once a week and Lapis asked her teacher for advice on art schools. They came home with pamphlets and essay questions and entrance tests to study for.

Lapis finally got a piece chosen for a show that debuted on Valentine's day. It's a painting of a figure lying in bed, back to the viewer, blonde hair messy against her pillow, morning sunlight streaming through the windows. The watercolor gave it a hazy atmosphere, but the figure itself was rendered in loving detail. It was intimate, breathtaking, the viewer could feel the love the artist had for this person. 

Both Amethyst and Peridot came to the show. 

Peridot dressed to the nines while Amethyst wore her pair of jeans with the least holes in them. It was a formal event, Peridot had spent the night before touching up Lapis’s roots with her usual bright blue for just the occasion. Both had decided to keep their clothing a surprise from the other, Lapis showing up in a classy, black evening gown with a neck full of green gemstones. Peridot wore dress pants and nice shirt with a silver and black vest with blue designs and a matching blue bow tie. 

They could barely keep their eyes off each other. It was any wonder how either managed any conversation that night when all they could think about was each other.

Amethyst laughed as soon as she saw the painting. “It's funny, but that kinda looks like Peri's room.” She said, eyeing Lapis none too subtly and Lapis tried to avoid looking at her girlfriend as she gave a non committal excuse. 

They'd been getting careless, but neither was ready to announce anything. Maybe soon, maybe after someday became till death do us part, but not in the middle of an art show.

Amethyst wandered off to raid the food table and Lapis and Peridot traded terrible art based pick up lines until their laughter drew attention from the crowd and they decided to sneak away. Lapis lead Peridot to a restricted section and turned her lips red with swapped lipstick. Amethyst nearly caught them in the act and Peridot hurriedly put on an intentional layer of Lapis’s lipstick in an attempt to cover herself.

Luckily Amethyst didn’t seem to notice that Peridot was wearing more make up than she’d come in with, too preoccupied by the fact that she’d been asked to leave after filling up on too many snacks. Peridot, as her ride, has to leave with her, giving Lapis an apologetic look. She’d wanted to support her girlfriend and they’d been having fun besides. Lapis insisted it was alright and she needed to mingle anyway, so Peridot and Amethyst left her at the show.

Lapis came home later that night with a grin and three business cards from people interested in her talent. She and Peridot celebrated with wine and a romantic dinner and a double pronged strap-on that filled Lapis up like nothing had before. She rode Peridot until they were pushing the limit on their orgasm record and then ate her girlfriend out until they were both too exhausted to continue.

_______

When they felt daring, they went out on dates. Neither really cared for the traditional dinner and a movie, so mostly what they did was pack a picnic and go try to find the most restricted place to eat together in. Peridot taught Lapis how to pick a lock and they tested her new skill on a junkyard just outside of town.

It was far enough away from the town lights that they could see fields of stars. Both knew a surprising amount about astronomy and they swapped knowledge and giggled about the things they didn't know. They lay down on the roof of a car and held hands and talked about their future.

They'd get an apartment together, Peridot would sell her tech skills and Lapis would sell art and, if they had to, they'd get second jobs and suffer, but it'd be together, so it would perfect.

Their dates didn't always go as planned. They were breaking and entering, after all, so it was to be expected that they'd have trouble eventually. They started taking more precautions after their first run-in with a security guard. An hour spent huddled under a table, legs falling painfully asleep, didn't deter them from trying again a few days later, even though they both agreed it was crazy.

Instead they parked the car further away, discussed exit plans and rendezvous points and made sure that it was easy to collect their food in case they had to make a quick getaway.

Peridot was glad for the precaution when they got the actual police called on them for breaking into an abandoned apartment complex. They just wanted to get to the roof, they had no idea people were looking out for squatters. The sirens tipped them off, but they had only made it to the fourth floor before cops entered the building.

Lapis dragged Peridot into the nearest apartment, and they took a moment to properly secure their meal in a small box. The apartment had a balcony overlooking the street near where they parked and Peridot tossed their food down into the bushes beneath them.

They heard the cops blocking off the stairwells and calling for backup. The balcony was looking like the better escape every minute they waited.

“Shit.” Cursed Peridot.

“Fuck.” Agreed Lapis.

Lapis helped Peridot down over the side and carefully climbed down after her. Twice more they did it until they reached the bottom floor, arms shaking with effort, hands sore from the metal bars. They couldn't have been more elated when they hopped that last hurdle, grabbed their picnic, and took off towards the car. There was only a waist high fence between them and freedom and Peridot had never considered how adrenaline could make a person more athletic. 

She vaulted the fence with one hand and a wild laugh. It was hard not to peel out of the area, but Peridot managed, keeping the lights off until they were far enough away.

When they pulled onto the highway, both girls burst into laughter. Hopped up on adrenaline and each other, they barely made it to a vacant lot before they were kissing wildly.

Lapis gripped Peridot's neck and Peridot clutched Lapis's hips and their passion made their kiss sloppy. Lapis tugged them both into the backseat and they fumbled awkwardly to keep their lips locked. Lapis stumbled to the floor, Peridot lost her shoe when she dragged across the steering wheel. 

They found they couldn't stop giggling.

Still, once they were settled, Lapis laying back and Peridot kneeling over her, their hands began to wander. Peridot pulled the strap of Lapis's dress off her shoulders and kissed her way lower. Her teeth sunk into her flesh at regular intervals, making Lapis moan and squirm, until she got to sensitive nipples.

Lips and tongue turned more gentle, wrapping around one nipple and then the other, alternating until Lapis was pleading with her for more. Chuckling, Peridot kissed and nipped further down, pulling the dress all the way off.

Sitting up a bit, Peridot took in the sight underneath her. Lapis, spread out against dark upholstery, tanned skin and electric blue hair standing out in stark contrast. She wasn't wearing a bra and now laid in only blue lacy panties. Peridot cupped her, thumb rubbing against her clit through the fabric, and making Lapis arch and toss her head.

Slowly, teasingly, Peridot brushed her thumb around and around, making her lover squirm and whimper. She could feel Lapis's wetness beginning to soak into the fabric and rubbed her own thighs together eagerly. Her thumb began to prune up as it grew damp and Peridot finally pulled back to have a taste.

Lapis looked up at her when the pressure against her most sensitive place stopped and a wicked grin spread across Peri's face. She made a show of dragging her tongue across her thumb, collecting Lapis's musky taste. Face flushing, Lapis covered her mouth with her hand, but her blue eyes were shining with arousal.

Deciding that she wanted a direct taste, Peridot pulled Lapis's panties off, removed her own glasses, and leaned down to settle between her thighs. She wasted no more time, planting her lips around Lapis's swollen clit.

The effect was immediate, Lapis tossed her head back with a cry, squirming powerfully. Peridot had to wrap her arms around her thighs to keep her still. She focused her tongue on her girlfriend's clit, drawing poetry in binary. The erratic rhythm of ones and zeros kept Lapis's thighs shaking right up until she hit her first orgasm.

Well practiced at sending Lapis into a frenzy, Peridot knew exactly how to lighten the pressure on her clit so that she could easily drive her to another climax right on the tail of the first one. Peridot was sure the car was visibly shaking from all the thrashing Lapis was doing, but she just did her best to hold on and lap up what she could. 

Peridot sat up once Lapis relaxed back against the seat, wiping her face with the back of her hand. The only thing she hated about going down on her girlfriend was how messy it was, but she firmly believed that it was worth the effort. 

Once her face was suitably clean, Peridot began to unbutton her jeans, wiggling until she could slip them off her hips. She let them fall carelessly to the floor, then carefully crawled up until she was straddling one of Lapis's thighs. Reaching for her girlfriend's hand, she directed it in between her legs, pulling aside her underwear so that those slim fingers could rub against her directly.

Lapis caught on quickly, feeling around for a moment to get her bearings, before pushing her middle two fingers inside Peridot slowly. Peridot groaned luxuriously, thrusting her hips up and down, riding Lapis's fingers, grinding down to find just the right spot. Lapis matched her rhythm, content to let Peridot have control, curling her fingers just the way she knew her girlfriend liked it. Her free hand came up to slip under Peri's shirt, fondling her chest affectionately while Lapis listened to her orgasm build.

When Peridot's moans quieted down to desperate whimpers, Lapis reached around and dragged her nails sharply down Peridot's back. Peridot came undone with Lapis's name tumbling frantically from her lips.

In the aftermath, they lay together, Peridot catching her breath, Lapis stroking her back and absently sucking on her fingers. They exchanged declarations of love, more than once, before they pulled themselves back together and drove back home.

Although this had been fun, both decided that maybe their rebellious streak was quelled. For now.

________

Two weeks before their anniversary, Peridot waltzed into first period with a smug grin on her face, “Good morning, Lazuli!”

Everyone within earshot stared, including a surprised and suspicious Lapis. “....What're you doing?”

“I'm simply greeting my classmate.” Peridot explained leaning against her desk with that insufferable smirk only growing.

Lapis regards her with narrowed eyes, “Did you lose a bet or….?”

“Not yet I haven't. Nor do I intend to.” Peridot's response makes Lapis sigh.

“What's the wager? And with who?” She asked, face morphing back into her normal bored expression.

“Pearl said that I couldn't be nice to you for an entire week. Whoever wins gets to take the lead on our next club project. I do not intend to lose.” She looked entirely too pleased with herself and, while Lapis understood why, she couldn't help giving her a hard time.

“Really? Well, I beg to differ. I don't think you can do it either.” Lapis smirked, “You're too much of a smug asshole.”

For a moment, a disgruntled look crossed Peridot's face, straining her smile. Then it snapped back to full force and she waggled a finger at Lapis, “Ahh, I see what you're doing here. Make no mistake, I've got this in the bag, but I'm intrigued by a challenge on both ends.”

“That's what she said.” Lapis shot back, knowing it would annoy her girlfriend.

Sure enough, Peridot's face twisted in disgust, but then she forced herself to laugh, “Hahaha, good one, Lazuli! Oh, this sense of humor, what would we do without it?”

Lapis grinned evilly, she loved Peridot, but she was going to torment her with this bet. “Go sit down, nerd, I'll think of ways for you to kiss my ass later.”

Lapis was excited at the prospect of teasing her girlfriend all day. She drew up a list of things she could ask Peridot to do for her, kept dragging her into conversion with insults and quips, and kept making lame jokes that would force Peridot to laugh along and compliment her.

The first day went off without a hitch. Peridot was so disgruntled by the end of it that she completely skipped out on engineering club. Lapis decided that she'd make it up to her girlfriend when she got home, but then, something unexpected happened.

When Lapis got home from school that day, she found dinner waiting for her, Peridot greeting her with a sweet kiss. After dinner, Peridot rubbed her shoulders and made love to her in the truest sense of the phrase. She whispered sweet nothings to her, thrusting a strap-on into her in slow, even strokes, making Lapis reach emotional heights that she rarely did. 

After she came down from her orgasm high and her crying jag, Peridot even declined having Lapis return the favor, saying that it was all about her.

“What was all this?” Lapis asked after her voice was steady and she was nestled comfortingly against Peridot's shoulder. 

“I thought it might be fun to bring that bet home. Not that I need an excuse to show you how much I love you, but I can certainly take an opportunity when it presents itself.” Peridot explained, massaging Lapis's scalp with blunted nails.

“Are you planning to do this all week?” She murmured curiously.

“Perhaps nothing so emotionally strenuous, but yes. I want to dote on you, Lapis; I love you, I think you're special and you deserve to feel that way. That's why it's going to be so easy for me to win!” Peridot kissed her forehead gently, “Even if you wanna be mean to me, I know you don't mean it. I welcome your challenge.”

Lapis flushed, feeling her heart swelling with emotion. “I love you, too. I can't wait to be married to you.” Peridot made a pleased noise and kissed Lapis lightly.

Day two found Lapis sitting at her desk, waiting for Peridot to make her entrance. She had a bunch of snarky responses ready to go. A few minutes before the bell, Peridot came in with a skip to her step.

“Good morning, Lazuli! What a fine day it is, don't you agree?” Peridot called, bouncing up to Lapis's desk with a pleased smile.

Lapis opened her mouth, ready to lash out with a clever reply and then, stopped. In an instant, looking at her lover's genuine smile, all she could think of was yesterday after school. 

How happy Peridot was to tell her how much she loved her, her touch, her kisses. How she'd smiled down at Lapis just like that as she told her how much she meant to her. How she'd told Lapis that she was prepared for her to be mean. Lapis thought of all of these things and found that her snark disappeared.

Instead, her face flushed darkly and she hunched her shoulders in embarrassment, “Yeah, Per, it is.”

Lapis found it easy to ignore the stunned looks the rest of the class was giving her when her lover beamed at her like that.

________

Lapis spent the rest of the day in a total fluster. Peridot was so genuine and sweet, she offered to carry Lapis's books, held open doors for her, complimented her work and offered help when Lapis struggled. Lapis wanted to cry, she had no idea how to handle this affection in public.

Actually, crying was probably just how she handled all affection, considering that it happened even when they were alone. 

They cooked dinner together and Peridot stole kisses and playful gropes. Lapis got another massage afterwards, which turned into her riding Peridot's strap-on while they held each other tightly. There was less sweet nothings, but Lapis still felt overwhelmingly loved and Peridot carefully wiped her eyes of tears after her orgasm knocked her over.

By Thursday, Lapis felt like she was having a crisis. She was definitely a hair's breadth away from snapping and either kissing Peridot or declaring their relationship to everyone or both. 

She settled for marching up to Pearl after lunch, knocking her books from her arms and glaring at her with all the building frustration of the past few days. “This is your fault.” She growled ominously, then kicked a book into Pearl's open locker and slammed it shut petulantly.

She ignored the confused and disgruntled, ‘Hey!’ from behind her, feeling vindicated after her petty outburst. 

It gave her the energy to get through the rest of the day.

Needless to say, Peridot was very confused when meeting with Lapis and Steven after club. 

“Pearl told me that we didn't have to compete anymore. She told me that I won and that I needed to take ‘the brunt of Lapis's anger’?” She plopped down on the floor and gave Lapis a concerned look, “Did something happen?”

Lapis laughed nervously, “I may have bullied her a bit. Whoops.”

Steven looked aghast, Peridot looked more confused, “Why?” They asked at the same time, but in different tones.

Lapis shrugged, “I didn't have the heart to be mean to you. So, I took it out on Pearl.”

Peridot shook her finger at her, “Lazuli, for shame. If you needed to bounce off of my intellect, you should have just said something. No need to torment a silly fencer when my superior brain power is the better match for your stubborn comebacks.”

Lapis snorted and shoved Peridot's shoulder. Peridot looked proud, Steven looked ecstatic; things were back to normal, but better.

________

The week before Spring Break, Peridot sent her ring in to get resized. They made last minute preparations for their upcoming marriage, intent on using the holiday as a honeymoon.

They planned a road trip; a few parks, museums, beaches, and sights marked to go see during their vacation. Hotels were booked and paid for, time tables were sketched out, they just needed to wait to pack and go. They would do that the Sunday before they would leave.

In school, things were different; they snarked and traded banter, but they held no perceived animosity towards each other. Everyone thanked Pearl for the new found peace and maybe she was responsible the inciting incident, but Lapis and Peridot knew the truth.

They were in love and tired of hiding it.

Anticipation was difficult to deal with and both girls decided to hold back on sex until after their honeymoon had started. They’d thought it would be easy, but they were restless and hormonal teenagers. They had to remind each other and themselves multiple times that there would be plenty of time during the rest of their lives and also that abstaining would make the next time even better.

They settled on binge watching tv shows and looking at apartments for after graduation. Neither had gotten any letters back from colleges yet, but they expected answers after the break was done.

Finally, _finally_ , the time was nearly upon them. Lapis's parents had come home for Easter and seemed upset that she had plans during the holy week. She'd gone back to her house to try and placate them. Peridot's own mother came home unexpectedly, shortly after Lapis left, and she brought with her an ominous air. 

“Peridot.” She called from within her office, prompting her daughter to enter and stand awkwardly in front of her desk. She had no idea what her mother could want and she had a bad feeling this wasn't going to end well.

“You're not to go through with this plan, Peridot.” She said without preamble, making dread sink into Peridot's stomach.

“What plan?” She managed, voice trembling. She couldn't know, there was no way. They'd been so careful!

She gave Peridot an unamused look, “You know what plan, don't play dumb.” Her hands clacked across her laptop, then turned to screen around to show Peridot a scene from the night before. A clear picture of her and Lapis, lounging on the love seat. From the speakers, Peridot could hear the sound of the show they were watching. The view was from up high and encompassed her entire room.

“Did you really think that I'd leave my teenage daughter alone in my house without supervision of some kind?” Peridot's mother asked, looking at the horrified expression on Peridot's face. “I've allowed you to indulge this little tryst, but it's gone too far. You will not elope with that gold digging whore and if you dare to go through with it, you'll not be welcome back in my home. Or my family. I'll not have my livelihood compromised.”

Peridot felt sick. Her head was spinning and her stomach was rolling, disbelief sinking deep into her. “How much do you know?”

“Everything. There's nothing that goes on in this house that I'm not aware of. Peridot,” her mother said, matter of factly, “I don't care that you're gay, that's trendy now, I can spin that to my advantage. I don't even care about your strange sexual appetites, so long as they're kept under wraps. Plenty of people in this business are similar in those regards and there's clubs you can go to to help with whatever you need.”

“But to date someone with so little money? No, that's unacceptable. I've seen it time and again, people like that will do nothing except take advantage of you. Be sensible, this can't work out, whether you break up with her and stay in the family or you leave the family for her and she will leave you when you no longer have money.”

“Lapis loves me.” Peridot growled lowly, feeling herself shake with anger and horror. “You may think you know our relationship, but you have no idea! You're making an unfair judgement on her without even knowing her as a person!”

“You're just being naive.” Her mother brushed her off with a hand wave, “This is not up for debate, anyway. I've made my decision. Time to make yours.”

Peridot simmered angrily, arms crossed, “What about the cameras? Do you have footage of us saved? Will you use it as blackmail?”

“No, to both questions. The footage is erased after twenty four hours and I've not found any reason to make a copy.” She sounded bored, Peridot realized, like she didn't care either way what her own daughter chose. She sounded like she did this all the time.

Peridot made her choice.

She showed up an hour later on Lapis's doorstep, tears running down her cheeks. Lapis answered the door and pulled her into a hug immediately, letting Peridot cry it out until she could be lead up to the bedroom.

________

Things were still a little subdued the next day, but both girls were filled with determination. After Peridot explained what she'd found out, and also spent some time throwing up over it, they'd discussed the next steps.

Peridot would stay with Lapis until after graduation. They didn't feel the need to consult her parents on this, since they'd be gone once Spring Break was over and would only be back for graduation. By that time, the lovers would be working out their shared apartment and they knew the plan after that.

Monday morning came and the two packed up Peridot's car, using the guise of an early start to avoid any more unpleasantness that might come their way. They stopped by the courthouse on the way out of town and just the idea of what came next made them both start feeling better.

They'd spoken to someone before hand and had filled out the necessary paperwork, all they needed was to file everything and get a signature on their certificate. Beach City was small enough that everything could be done immediately and they were early enough that the courthouse was nearly empty when they arrived.

The only ones that knew about the marriage were the judge and two of his clerks.

Lapis and Peridot beamed at the three, exchanging rings amidst the happy smiles. Although they were young, the reception they got was positive, congratulations and well wishes exchanged between everyone.

They started their honeymoon hand in hand.

______

Being together, newly wed and away from anyone that knew them, was an experience in and of itself. For the first time ever, Lapis and Peridot could be open about themselves and their affection. They held hands or walked with arms slung around each other. When they stopped to eat, they fed each other and shared kisses and touches. 

The lack of disapproving looks was encouraging.

The days passed in a blur of happiness. Their road trip was contained to the east coast, spreading out from Delmarva to the north first and then circling back to go south. North had the big cities and museums, while south was for more rural vacation spots. Their first stop was a gruesome medical museum in Keystone, which Peridot talked about in great length on the ride there.

Lapis couldn’t have said she was necessarily thrilled at the subject matter, since she was a little squeamish when it came to such things, but Peridot was insistent that it would be educational and fun. They didn’t make it halfway through the exhibits before Peridot was pulling Lapis towards the door, green around the gills. They settled on a nice art museum instead.

They’d really gone all out for the trip and had rooms booked in each city they stopped in. In Keystone was a motel that Steven had recommended, a quaint little place where Lapis carried Peridot over the threshold, both of them giggling so much she could barely walk. They flopped onto the bed together and just lay in each other’s arms. 

Neither could scarcely believe they’d taken the next step in their relationship.

They made love as a married couple for the first time in a cheap motel, with heavily starched sheets and a scratchy comforter and nothing could have been more perfect.

They could barely drag themselves out of bed early enough to get back on the road, but they managed, the excitement of the next stop giving them the energy they needed to get going to a breakfast place for actual caffeine. They drove all morning to get to Empire City; the game plan was to take in as many tourist traps as possible.

They checked into their hotel and took a bus to a diner of some renown for lunch, then headed off to Times Square to take as many selfies as possible with the tall buildings in the background. They went to the viewing deck of the Empire State building and scoped out the city from a bird’s eye view, then went back down to enjoy ice cream in the park. They took a ferry over to visit the Freedom statue and the immigration museum, then came back to the city proper for more museum crawling.

Once the sun went down and the lights all came on, they returned to Times Square and had dinner in a restaurant with a great view of the city, but with prices that made them both wince and promise _‘just this once’_. Then it was back to the streets for more pictures, this time with everything all lit up. By the time they made it to the hotel, they were exhausted, but not so much that they couldn’t make love again.

They had to get up even earlier to leave on time and were still tired when they checked out, but the car was quickly filled with laughter and singing as they headed to their next destination, turning around to go south to the nation’s capital. It was a longer drive this time, but they still managed to make it to the city by lunch. After the expensive dinner last night, they pulled into a diner before going to their hotel and enjoyed something greasy and fried.

This stop was all museums all day, so they hurriedly ate, checked into their hotel and made their way to the biggest museum complex in the city. They spent the rest of their day ‘oooh’ing and ‘aahh’ing over history, science, art, and the animals at the zoo. They stayed until closing time and then went out to dinner. This time they were determined to get an earlier night, both agreeing to a break after the nonstop schedule of the last few days.

They retired to their hotel right after dinner to cuddle and watch tv for the rest of the night. They were asleep before midnight.

Both were up early again, ready for another long drive, and this time it was Lapis that couldn’t stop talking. The next three stops were to beaches and she couldn’t wait. She was practically bouncing in her seat as they took off from the Capital City, mouth going a mile a minute while Peridot looked on in affectionate amusement. They were going to hit Old Dominion, the Tar Heel State, and the Palmetto State and spend time at boardwalks at each state’s most famous beaches.

When she’d suggested these stops, Peridot had pointed out that they lived within spitting distance of a boardwalk. Lapis had argued that vacation was different and Peridot hadn’t been able to make a come back to that and even agreed that a change of scenery would be nice. Both were worried about Peridot, with her fair skin, getting sunburned, so they’d picked up the strongest sunscreen they could find. Lapis, of course, generously offered to help her put it on.

They knew they were getting close to the beach in Old Dominion when they entered a long, underwater tunnel. Lapis played a game during the short ride through it where she held her breath to see if she could, but Peridot was laughing at her and it made her giggle and lose before the end. They were in high spirits when they pulled up to their hotel a few blocks off the strip

Then the rain clouds formed.

By the time they’d gotten their stuff put up and were settled in their room, the sky had opened up and the rain was coming down in sheets. Lapis was incredibly disappointed, staring out the window despondently. Peridot had come to join her, wrapping an arm around her waist, then pointed out that there was no lightning or thunder. She suggested that they change into their swimsuits and go out anyway, since it was just water.

Lapis was overjoyed and they’d packed a change of clothes and beach towels in a waterproof bag and marched out into the storm. They were soaked before they even made it to the strip, but they were happy, holding hands and chatting about nothing and everything. They stopped at a pizza place to get some lunch, then walked down the strip to do some window shopping. By the time they got to the actual beach, the rain had lightened enough that they could easily swim, but the beach was still nearly deserted.

They dropped their things and charged out into the water, Peridot shrieking at how cold the ocean still was this early in the year. They played for hours, until the sun peeked out from behind the clouds and forced them to get out and put on sunscreen, then they went back until hunger was the next thing to stop them. At dinner, exhaustion hit them hard and they were nearly dead on their feet by the time they got back to their hotel.

Luckily, the next drive was only a couple hours, so they got plenty of sleep and woke up refreshed and energetic the next morning. Frisky, too, which lead to a bit of a later start than intended, but they still managed to check out on time and get on the road with some breakfast to go. Lapis spent the ride scouring forecasts to make sure the rain wouldn’t follow them and glared suspiciously at the clear sky until Peridot laughed and put on some music to sing to.

They arrived at lunch time with the weather still holding and pulled into a motel that sat practically on top of the beach. Within sight of the place was a huge fishing pier that boasted a fresh seafood restaurant and they decided to have lunch there. Afterwards, they could go straight to the water. The beach was a little more crowded this time, but not bad like it would probably be in the summer. Lapis slathered Peridot in sunscreen and they dove into the waves together. By the time they got out for dinner, it was Lapis that was starting to look a little red.

Peridot fussed over her, buying some soothing gel that she could put on later at the motel. Until then, Lapis was careful about putting pressure on the tops of her shoulders, which had taken the worst of the sun. When they finally came back for the night, Peridot ordered Lapis to get undressed and lay face down on the bed, turning her sunburn care into an impromptu massage. Inevitably that lead to something much more strenuous, but neither complained until they had to get up extra early the next morning. 

It was quite a drive to their last destination and Peridot had dragged them out of bed before the sun was up so that they could make it there by a decent hour. Lapis’s shoulders were still tender, but the burn gel was helping, especially with Peridot reapplying it for her every few hours. By the time they made it to the next motel, she’d nearly forgotten all about it.

They stopped for lunch, then decided to hold off on the beach in favor of some other sights on the strip. There was a small park with some thrill rides, haunted houses and interesting attractions, and the shops were numerous and interesting. They explored hand in hand, not even getting onto the beach until the sun was beginning to set. They played and splashed around until it was just the moon lighting up everything for them. 

The atmosphere was incredibly romantic and intimate and if they’d been the only ones on the beach, they’d very much have done something inadvisable in a public area. Instead, they gathered their things, changed into dry clothes and headed for dinner. After that they decided to close their night with a trip around on a ferris wheel. When it stopped at the top, the view of the ocean was amazing, but they barely noticed when they only had eyes for each other.

Coming back to the motel, they both decided to spend the rest of the night making love and pointedly not thinking about how they’d have to go home tomorrow.

The thought that they'd have to go back to hiding once they got home was sobering, something they only allowed to hit them on the long ride back. They clutched each other's hand and the car was silent for the first time all week. They didn't want to go back to hiding, they wanted to be open and proud.

“I want to tell people.” Lapis finally said, breaking the silence as a sign indicated there was only ten miles until they hit Beach City. 

“So do I.” Peridot confessed in return, “At the very least, I don't want to deny it.”

“Maybe we don't have to say anything. Maybe we can just be. And if anyone asks, we'll tell them.” Lapis suggested, running her thumb across the new ring on her left hand. She'd been doing it constantly since Peridot slid it onto her finger Monday and she'd noticed her wife doing the same.

Wife; just the thought made Lapis grin. 

“I think that's agreeable.” Peridot nodded, taking Lapis's hand and bringing it to her lips so she could kiss her knuckles. Lapis felt herself flush with happiness.

“Then, tomorrow. Everything will be different.” Lapis declared.

“And if it comes back to your parents?” Peridot asked hesitantly.

“We'll deal with it together.”


	5. Mooning + Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coming up on the end of their last year of high school, how will things change for our intrepid lovers?

On Monday morning, Lapis and Peridot walked into school together, not holding hands, because Lapis's were full with her washed gym clothes and swimsuit, but they were close to each other. They held a pleasant conversation, teasing each other, occasionally flirting, acting as though this was normal behavior for them.

They were both nervous, they knew that, could see it in their wife's face, but they had decided they wouldn't hide anymore. They comforted each other the best way they knew how, with snide remarks and boasting words, saving the sweet nothings for more private moments.

They had attempted to bet on who would be the first to say something about their supposedly new found closeness, but both had thought of the same person.

Amethyst came into class to find them sitting at Lapis's desk, chatting about nothing in particular, Lapis endlessly spinning her ring on her finger and wondered, “What's going on with you two?”

The two in question exchanged a knowing look before bursting into laughter. “Knew it would be you.” Lapis giggled, breathless with mirth.

Peridot grinned proudly, “Should we tell her or keep her guessing?”

“Let's keep her guessing, I wanna tell Steven first.” Lapis said with a mischievous smile.

Amethyst, a person bound to curiosity and temptation, looked like they'd just offered her a juicy steak and then took it away. “Awww, come on. You gotta tell me now, I can't wait 8 hours!” 

Just at that moment, the bell rang and Peridot sauntered back to her desk, waving carelessly over her shoulder. It was a decidedly Lapis movement and the girl felt her heart flutter at the thought of rubbing off on her wife.

Wife, it still made her all tingly inside.

Amethyst tried her best to wheedle information out of Lapis, using her supernatural ability to talk endlessly, but only managed to nearly land herself in detention.

After first period, there was a buzz of gossip about them in the hallways and classrooms. The school's biggest rivals were suddenly getting along famously and also hiding the reason. By the end of the day, the consensus was that they had started dating, but both girls just smiled mysteriously when they were asked. 

After school, Lapis came from swim practice, which consisted mostly of her hiding underwater from prying questions, and she found Peridot surrounded by a curious Amethyst and Steven. They were apparently trying their best to grill her, but Peridot was holding firm against pleading and puppy dog eyes.

“Don't you know that patience is a virtue?” Lapis announced herself, accepting her usual greeting from Steven and swinging him around.

Peridot beamed at her, “About time, Laz, I think they were about to start on the torture before you arrived.”

“Steven wouldn't have let me.” Amethyst shot back with a fake pout.

“What's this big news?” Steven asked as they all sat on the floor.

Lapis took a seat next to Peridot, casually resting her arm across her shoulders. She reached down to grab her wife's left hand in her own and held both up to show off their rings, “We got married.”

The shock was palatable, Amethyst and Steven rendered totally speechless. Lapis and Peridot exchanged a nervous glance, waiting for nearly a minute for a reaction. 

Finally, Amethyst burst out, “I knew it! I knew you two were dating! Lapis! Your painting WAS Peridot!”

“You guys were dating this whole time?” Steven breathed, stars in his eyes, “I said you guys could be close, but I had no idea! How long? Why hide it?”

Another exchanged glance and it was decided that Lapis would take over telling. “We've been together for three years and we hid it because our parents wouldn't approve.”

“My mother kicked me out.” Peridot revealed and Lapis rubbed her neck gently. Peridot shifted to drape herself against Lapis's side in the way they snuggled on the couch. Amethyst and Steven watched them in interest, as if they could hardly believe their eyes.

“That's stupid, there's nothing wrong with your relationship.” Amethyst scoffed and Steven nodded in agreement.

“We're gay and I'm poor.” Lapis shrugged, “That's enough.”

“For now I'm staying with Lapis, but once we figure out which college we're getting into, we'll get an apartment together.” Peridot explained, straightening up. It was hardly a comfortable position, especially when they were on the hard tile floor. Lapis still kept an arm over Peridot's shoulders.

“I can't believe you guys managed to keep things under wraps for so long. Peri, everyone was talking about that hickey you showed up with. And Lapis,” she gave Lapis a look, “You literally painted Peri sleeping, probably naked, in bed in her room.”

Lapis chuckled, “She wasn't naked in that one.”

“There's more!?” Amethyst exclaimed while Steven looked flustered.

“They're tasteful!” Peridot defended.

Lapis laughed, “She's my muse, so sometimes I get her to pose for me. Every artist does tasteful nudes.” She shrugged, “Although sometimes it's exactly what you think.”

“Can we… talk about something else?” Steven asked weakly.

Lapis and Peridot both blushed. They had nearly forgotten Steven was there.

“Anyway! We’ve got a plan. We just need to find out where we're going to college and then we can make final preparations.” Peridot said in a valiant effort to change the subject.

“Are you guys gonna tell everyone else?” Amethyst broached curiously.

“We decided that we weren’t going to deny anything.” Peridot clarified, “But we aren’t going to make an announcement. We need to make sure nothing gets back to Lapis’s parents.”

Steven looked very sad at this, “You think they won't like it? They're your parents.”

Lapis smiled and gently patted his head, “You have good parents, Steven. It must be hard to understand, but this is for the best.” 

“Don't worry about us, Steven.” Peridot said cheerful, chest puffing up in pride, “We've got this, just a few more months to go, then we'll be free.”

________

They still stopped by Peridot's house to check the mail, since they were both eagerly waiting college responses. There were several thick envelopes waiting when Peridot opened the box and she had Lapis hold them during the rest of the ride to avoid the temptation to open them immediately.

Of course, she ended up swatting Lapis more than once for _her_ curiosity.

When they finally made it to Lapis's house, there were two more envelopes waiting with the mail. Lapis snatched them up excitedly and the girls raced each other up the stairs.

Both of Lapis's envelopes were approvals and so were two of Peridot's, but Peri's first choice had rejected her. She pouted at Lapis until she got a hug and kiss, then the two settled in to compare.

They were still expecting a few more notices, but the choices they did have were great. There was one college they had both applied to only a few hours away from Beach City that quickly topped their list, but they weren't ready to count the other places out yet. Still, they spent the rest of the night looking into the area near each of the colleges and pricing apartments and dorms.

Over the next few days, the girls received more and more letters back. There were a few rejections that made ruling out choices easier, but the responses were overwhelmingly positive.

Still, they kept coming back to that first acceptance, since it was the only college that was able to take them both.

“The engineering program is highly accredited.” Peridot mused, looking over the pamphlet again.

The two sat on Lapis's couch together, the TV on, but muted. Around them lay their acceptance letters and on both their knees balanced Peridot's laptop. 

“Yeah, it's arts program is even more so.” Lapis agreed

“This is the one, isn't it?” Peridot asked with a small smile.

Lapis's chest felt tight, but in a way that was both good and scary. “Let's go visit the city one weekend. Maybe check out the campus.”

“We can move there over the summer. If we like it, I mean. Get settled, get a job and stuff?” Peridot ventured hesitantly. 

“That was the original plan, silly.” Lapis shoved aside the papers around them and pulled Peridot into her arms, “I love you. I can't believe we're doing this.”

Peridot snuggled under Lapis's chin, “Me either, but it's so…. Exciting. And terrifying.”

“It feels right, though. Doing this together.” Lapis admitted quietly, feeling shy. 

Peridot went to go say something, her words coming out in an embarrassed jumble. Lapis chuckled and waited for her to collect herself, curiosity tugging at her. Whatever thought her wife ( _wife!_ ) just had was enough to fluster her, which was unusual.

“You're…” Peridot managed after a moment, “You're my family. I want this, with you. Moving into an apartment together, moving to a new place together. Starting our lives together. It's wonderful.”

“I had a dream like this once.” Lapis said, voice trembling, “Just you and me, laying around and planning out our future together. I never thought then that it would be a reality. We've come a long way since.”

Peridot leaned forward and they shared a sweet, long kiss. When they finally pulled back, both girls were smiling, “Wanna check out when the campus tours are?” Peridot asked softly.

“I love it when you talk academic to me, baby.” Lapis chuckled.

_________

They spent the next week making plans to go to the college. First period became an early morning meeting for them, both hunched over Peridot's phone and ignoring the looks their classmates were giving them. 

They knew it must have been strange, from an outsider's perspective for them to suddenly be so close, but it wasn't anyone's business but their own so they didn't feel the need to clarify.

They decided on a Friday six weeks before graduation to go visit the campus and finish up any paperwork they might have had. They'd have to skip a day, but both decided to let their teachers know ahead time what they were up to. Since it was for school, they were basically given a free pass to go.

So, they piled into Peridot's car just as the sun was brightening the sky on the chosen Friday morning. They had almost been too excited to sleep the night before, so both girls were groggy and clutching coffee cups like a lifeline. It was a almost a three hour drive, doable, but uncomfortable when the tours started before noon.

Still, an hour in and they were blasting songs from popular children's movies and trying to sing in the most dramatic fashion possible. Peridot tried to take the low notes, but singing was far outside her talent pool. Lapis was a surprisingly good soprano when she put her mind to it and they made do with this as entertainment for the remainder of the journey.

Pulling into the city, both girls were in a bit of awe. The traffic was bad, even in between rush hour and lunch, but they were impressed by the modern look of recently renovated buildings on one side of the street and the school on the other. It was obvious that the city had just undergone massive reconstruction and it was well worth the effort. 

The storefronts across from the school were classy gray and black with white trim, contrasting the school buildings’ brick and white concrete designs. In the middle of the road were set up a series of bus stops, with dedicated lanes seeming to run people just through the heart of downtown. Peridot was particularly excited at the map of the city etched into the glass barrier, but she couldn’t pull her eyes away long enough to get a good look.

“Okay.” Lapis said slowly, rubbernecking so that Peridot could focus on the traffic, “This looks better than I thought it would.”

“I'm excited again. These terrible drivers kinda took the wind out of my sails earlier, but I'm back in it.” Peridot darted the car through a left turn, through a break in the traffic, grumbling about the timing of the lights.

“So we're investing in a bike, right?” Lapis chuckled as they circled the block a few times, trying to find a parking deck.

“Oh definitely. At the very least a bus pass. Maybe some good walking shoes.” After only another ten minutes of harrowing driving, Peridot pulled into a suitable area. They gathered their things and packed up the car and made their way towards the meeting place. Peridot had a map pulled up on her phone and Lapis hooked her arm through her wife's elbow and leaned over her shoulder. 

They dropped by a coffee shop to empty their tanks and then refuel, then made their way to the meeting place, about ten minutes early. There were a few people milling about, but Lapis wasn't interested in socializing. She sat on the edge of a concrete planter and pulled Peridot into her lap to wait.

Peridot chuckled and stroked her hair, “Feeling tired, Laz?”

“Yeah.” Lapis sighed, closing her eyes and leaning into the touch. 

Time passed in peaceful silence until the tour guide showed up and called everyone to attention. They stood and held hands as the guide lead them through an introduction and then on a walk through a park and a basic view of the campus.

Afterwards, they grabbed a quick bite and then headed off to tours of their individual departments. They'd had to call in especially to set up appointments for that, which meant they didn't get to do these tours together. It was a blessing and a curse, as they didn't have each other as distractions, but they also didn't have each other to share excitement with. 

By the time they met up, Lapis had an invite to dinner with a group of art students and Peridot had the numbers of a couple locals that knew good apartments. They followed the directions the art students had given Lapis and ran across the street to a small restaurant advertising different flavors of…. Something.

“What's a hookah?” Peridot asked as they walked into the restaurant. Immediately they were assaulted by wafting, sweet smelling smoke, seeming to originate from a large contraption set up in each occupied table. Lapis pointed to a corner booth where four people sat with what must have been this mysterious hookah thing, passing around a hose and pulling smoke through the nozzle in the end.

“Are you gonna be okay with the smoke?” Lapis asked before they got too far into the building.

Peridot felt her heart swell a little and she leaned in to peck Lapis on the cheek, “I'll be fine. Now, introduce me to your new friends.”

Lapis grinned and they headed to the table hand in hand, “Hey guys.” Lapis greeted when she got close and they helped her and Peridot pull up extra chairs from the nearby unused tables.

“Glad you decided to join us!” A girl whose dark hair shimmered red when the light hit it just right said, offering the hose to the newcomers.

Lapis waved the offering away graciously as she and Peridot took their seats, “Thanks for the invite.” She motioned to each of the people in turn and said to Peridot, “This is Lizzy, Maria, Freddy, and John.” She turned back to the table and rested an arm across Peridot's shoulders, “Guys, this is Peridot, my wife.”

John, a heavyset boy with short blonde hair, inhaled hard and started to choke. Lizzy, the redhead that greeted them originally, pounded on his back. Freddy, a muscular ginger, raised an eyebrow and gave them a once over, then shrugged and pulled out his phone to thumb absently at the screen.

Maria was the only one who could speak, and she did in a squeaky, mouse like voice that matched her shy appearance. “Wife? How old are you?”

“Eighteen.” Peridot supplied with a shrug, “We know we're a little young, but we have unique circumstances. We've also been together a long time.”

“Wow.” Maria sounded suitably impressed, “And now you guys were moving in together and going to school together. That's pretty sweet.”

Lapis and Peridot glanced at each other with small smiles, lacing their fingers together on Lapis's knee, “Yeah, I think so, too.”

__________

They were planning on getting a hotel room nearby and going to check out apartments the next day, but Freddy offered them his pull out couch and that seemed like a better deal. He lived within walking distance of the restaurant, but he said they could park their car on his lot to avoid any parking deck fees. Twenty minutes and a car ride later, the three of them were walking up the stairs of an old house that had been converted into student housing.

Freddy, they had learned, was a quiet guy, but he had a wicked sense of humor and was quick witted when it came to one liners and jokes. He had barely spoken ten words the whole night, but all of them had the girls in stitches. 

Peridot had to lean against Lapis as they stumbled up the stairs, still giggling. Freddy lead them into his home with a grin tugging at his own mouth and went about getting them set up on his couch. 

The apartment was small, but not cramped, plenty of room for a single person or even a couple. Lapis and Peridot took the sights on with eager eyes, trying to imagine their own things together in such a space. The effect was warming, both girls smiling at each other as they set their bags down and all but collapsed on the couch together.

Freddy chuckled at them, “Bathroom is that way, I'm gonna head on to bed, night.” And then he was gone and the two girls were left alone.

“We should probably follow his example, you know.” Peridot said after a moment of silence.

“Yeah.” Lapis agreed quietly.

Neither girl moved.

“This is really happening.” Lapis turned to regard her wife ( _wife!_ ) at the quiet, awed tone. Peridot was slowly shaking her head, a little half smile tugging at her lips. “It doesn't feel real.”

“It feels pretty scary.” Lapis's words earned her Peridot's full attention, “But, it's okay if it's with you. I feel like we can do this.”

Reaching towards each other, the girl clasped hands and took comfort in the closeness. “Let's get into pajamas and talk about the plan for tomorrow.” Peridot decided after a moment, kissing Lapis's forehead.

They went about their nightly routine in companionable silence, changing clothes, brushing teeth. They'd already discussed shower arrangements with their host and it was decided they'd use those facilities in the morning. Once they were finished, both girls climbed into bed and snuggled together to talk quietly.

It was incredibly domestic, discussing their day in a strange new environment. For a few moments, they pretended that they were in their own apartment, in their own bed, starting their new life together away from the pressures of their parents.

_______

The next day saw the two girls wandering through the city looking at housing. They, meaning Peridot, had meticulously planned out each showing in such a way that they could hit up all places in one area on foot, then take a paid ride over to another part of town to repeat the process without having to double back.

Lapis was more impressed because she'd even planned for lunch and a small break, surprising her with a treat at a nice restaurant in a small shopping district. They took a little time after to wander around and look at things and pet the numerous dogs that were being walked in the nice weather.

“We should get a dog.” Peridot said, thoughtfully watching a woman walk away with a chocolate lab in sunglasses on a leash. “When we get more settled. We're both planning to be in this city for a few years, once we get housing and work and school settled, we could probably fit in some animal companionship.”

Lapis felt inexplicably close to tears. She hugged Peridot from behind, face buried in the back of her neck, “That's a great idea.” She sniffled and felt Peridot laugh.

“You're something else, you know that? Getting choked up over a dog.” Lapis made a disgruntled noise, but she knew her wife ( _wife!_ ) was just as much of a sap.

“I'm getting choked up over starting a family with you, nerd.” She whispered in Peridot's ear and felt the flush the words induced.

“...hic.” It was Lapis's turn to laugh, the tiny sob making her heart swell.

“Now who's something else?”

Maybe they were both sentimental nerds, but at least they were nerds together. 

“You know, this place is only a 30 minute walk from the campus.” Peridot said, “And apparently it's where all the young, hip twenty somethings live. Plus we could pet dogs all the time if we were nearby.”

“It's also one of the more pricey neighborhoods.” Lapis pointed out, but her heart wasn't in it. It was a really nice area and the dogs kinda sold it. “We should keep this in mind, though, and check out the other places. No sense in letting your planning go to waste.”

It was sensible and Peridot agreed, but as they moved on, it became apparent that they'd already decided on the neighborhood. By the end of the day, they'd narrowed their choice to three and decided to call the realtors to discuss pricing and details.

Graduation was the middle of June, they put a safety deposit down to keep their spot and made an appointment to finalize things once it got a little closer to the end of the school year.

They rode back to Beach City holding hands and talking about their future home.

__________

Of course, not everything could run smoothly; with only a few weeks to go, things were getting harder for them to hide. The rumor that they were dating spread like wildfire, the fact that neither girl denied it did nothing to quell the excitement.

Peridot started getting calls from her mother at the same time Lapis was getting calls from her parents. The rumors had made it back to their families, with mixed results. Peridot's mother already knew, but the fact that she had effectively disowned her daughter was now looking bad.

She kept trying to convince Peridot to leave Lapis and come back using various means of coercion. At first it was sugary promises of home and family, which were the easiest and worst to turn down. Peridot was firm in the belief that Lapis was her family, but it was hard to be reminded that her mother never loved her the way she wanted her to.

When that failed, then came the thinly veiled threats. Random, seemingly innocuous information would come up in conversation, things that Peridot thought her mother couldn't possibly know about. The school they chose, the home they were looking at, their friends. Each time, Peridot would call in a panic to make sure that nothing had happened. She'd had to explain her situation to both her counselor and the realtor and both had made promises to keep an eye out.

After a solid week of calls, texts, emails, and letters, Peridot finally got the police involved. It was embarrassing and upsetting that things had gone this far, but she started filing for a restraining order.

Lapis tried her best to be supportive, helping Peridot block numbers and screening a lot of her calls, but on the fifth day, she received a worrying phone call of her own.

Her parents were furious, barely even giving her time to answer before they were screaming at her about sin and punishment. Lapis put them on speaker and started packing her bags.

“We'll be home in three days to talk about this, young lady.”

Which meant they had three days to find another place to stay.

“Maybe we can just sleep in my car and use the truck stop a few miles out on the highway to shower.” Peridot suggested as they loaded her vehicle with their bags.

“Should we see if we can stay with our friends?” Lapis broached hesitantly. It's what most people would do, but neither girl really liked feeling like a burden to those few they cared about.

“We essentially need a place to stay until July.” Peridot pointed out, “But maybe we should let them know what's going on.”

Both being intensely private people, they eventually agreed to just wait a little while to see how they coped before going to someone for help. They huddled up in Lapis's room and did their level best to block out all the bad stuff in their lives.

Lapis's parents came home on a Tuesday.

Lapis tried to have breakfast, because she'd barely been able to eat since she got the call, but she ended up puking from the stress. Peridot held her hair and rubbed her back while Lapis hunched over and heaved and cried about how unfair life was.

“Why can't we just be happy together? Why can't people just be happy for us?”

Peridot had no answers.

They decided to face Lapis's parents together. Lapis had never received a beating in her life, but she was actually afraid when she saw the looks on her parents’ faces. They looked down at Lapis and Peridot's clasped hands and seemed to get even angrier.

“It's obvious that you need more of God's surveillance in your life.” Her mother said and Peridot couldn't help shivering at the word choice, “You'll postpone college and spend the next year traveling with us and building churches.”

“I'm eighteen, mom. You can't make me do anything I don't want to.” Lapis sounded fierce, but her face was pale and everyone knew it.

“We're your parents and you will listen to us or find yourself without a place to live.” Her father's tone brooked no argument, as though his word was law.

“News flash, while you've been around the world fellating your God, I've been here living my life without you.” Lapis tightened her hold on Peridot's hand, lifting them up for emphasis. “Not only have we been dating for three years, but we got married! We're getting a home together! Our own life! My own life!”

Lapis's voice dropped to a cold hiss, “You spent so much time trying to be better worshippers that you missed everything I've ever done. So go ahead and kick me out. I've got places to go and people who love me a helluva lot more than you.”

For a moment, Peridot thought Lapis was going to get through to them. Her mother's face fell in remorse, tears shining in her eyes. Her father seemed stunned, as though this was some kind of revelation. 

Then her father's face turned to a cold fury, “Get out of my house, you disgusting sinner and take your hellbound lifestyle with you.”

So they did.

Peridot drove them around aimlessly, holding Lapis's hand as she struggled to calm down, but the tears just wouldn't stop. They were out for hours upon hours, until long after the sun went down, only stopping once for gas. Somehow, they ended up two towns over from Beach City, in a sleepy little burg with no lights on the streets.

Peridot barely noticed when they passed by a church, but she did notice Lapis suddenly tugging on her arm, “Pullover, park across the street.”

Obediently, Peridot did so, shifting into park and turning off the lights, “What's up?”

“I wanna defile that church.” Lapis announced, eyes sparkling with righteous fury.

“Uh, babe, I know we've done some shady stuff before, but I think actual vandalism is where I draw the line.” Peridot said with uncertainty.

“No, not that. I wanna break in and fuck in there.” Lapis rolled her eyes.

“Ohhhhhhh.” 

“Why don’t you go ahead and open the door for us while I grab some supplies from the back?” Lapis suggested with a wink that made Peridot scramble to comply.

She scampered up to the door, fiddling with the tools she carried on her keychain until she’d pulled out the right ones to make quick work of the old lock. The door gave a startling groan when she heaved the heavy wood open, but, after a terrified pause to make sure no one was coming, Peridot continued inside. 

The lights were low, but it wasn’t hard to see the layout; the front doors lead straight into the main chapel, pews stretched out in front of Peridot in a quiet, unassuming way. Up front was a pedestal and various religious memorabilia, an alter with unlit candles and crosses galore. Peridot barely paid it all any mind, she was too busy searching for the safest place they could fuck and not get caught immediately if someone happened to walk in.

The confessional booth caught her eyes, tucked away in the far corner. It was rather large, with red velvet curtains enclosing the two sections away from prying eyes. They probably did nothing to block any actual noise, but it certainly offered a bit of privacy. Peridot headed over to inspect it closer, curiously pulling one of the curtains away to peer inside. She’d never seen one of these in person, it was surprisingly underwhelming.

The creak of the door caught her attention and Peridot whipped her head around defensively, relaxing when she saw it was only Lapis. Her wife paused and looked around, smiling mischievously when she spotted Peridot, who waved her over.

“Perfect. I spent way too much time in one of these stuffy booths.” Lapis held up her haul, a double ended strap on and a bottle of lube, “Let’s really make it humid.”

Peridot snorted, “You know, humid is not and never will be a sexy term.”

“Maybe, but you wanna know what does turn you on?” Lapis leaned in nice and slow, making Peridot swallow heavily, “Knowing that you’re gonna get to fuck me nice and hard.”

“Yeah!” Came the squeak, “That does it for me.”

“Get ready. I’m gonna go check out the other side for once.” Handing over the toy, Lapis gave Peridot a playful shove, making her stumble backwards until she dropped into the bench behind her.

“Hey!” Peridot’s cry was met with a laugh and the closing of the curtain. After a moment of movement and shuffling, the screened divider between the two sides opened and Peridot realized that she could just barely see into the other space.

She peeked in at Lapis, who stuck out her tongue. In retaliation, Peridot put her fingers against her forehead in the shape of an ‘L’. Then the war was on, the two battling back and forth, trying to come up with the most obnoxious funny faces to make the other loose her composure laughing. 

After a fierce competition, Peridot slipped up and pulled a face she'd used before, unable to catch herself before Lapis gave a triumphant cry. “Ah! I win! I call top today!”

Still wheezing with laughter, Peridot leaned hard against the back of the booth, “I was already gonna put you on top, so who's really the winner here?” She managed after a moment to catch her breath.

A comfortable silence settled around them, Peridot had nearly forgotten why they'd even come in here in the first place. Then a quiet gasp broke through, shattering the atmosphere and turning it into something instantly hotter.

Whipping her head around, Peridot peered through the grate, spying Lapis leaning back with her lip caught between her teeth. The angle made it so she couldn't see below Lapis's chest, but the look on her face made it clear what she was doing.

“Peri.” Came a half moan, half gasp that sent shivers down Peridot's spine, “Have you gotten that toy on yet?”

“N-No.” She gulped. Lapis turned her head and caught Peridot's eyes, a smirk tugging at her lips. “W-What are you doing?”

“You know what I'm doing.” There was movement for a moment, then Lapis's held something up in front of the grate. It took Peridot a moment, but once she focused properly, she realized that Lapis was holding up her panties. “And I'm gonna keep doing it until you get ready for me.”

Letting out a shaky breath, Peridot began to remove her clothes as quietly as she could, listening intently for the sound of her wife's pleasure. Lapis didn't disappoint, letting out tiny little gasps, moans, and murmurs of her name. Peridot could even hear Lapis's fingers working against her growing wetness.

It was intoxicating.

Too soon Peridot was completely naked and working the harness up her legs, slipping one end into her own slick opening with a moan, and tightening the straps down. She poured a generous amount of lube into her hand and worked out up and down her silicone shaft.

“I'm ready.” Peridot announced gently, listening to Lapis's shuddering breath from beside her. She tried not to look as Lapis shuffled around and left her side, eyes trained in front of her in anticipation.

With a jerk, the curtain opened and there stood Lapis, face flushed with arousal. She looked the same as she did when they'd entered the church, but Peridot knew that she was bare beneath her flowing dress. 

“Show me how wet you are.” She breathed a quiet demand, leaning against the back of the booth. With one hand she teased her own nipples, index finger circling her areola and then flicking over the tip in a random rhythm. The other hand tugged the strap on firmly, causing the end buried inside her to thrust into her a bit.

A flush crawled up Lapis’s chest, neck and cheeks, turning her face a fetching shade of red. Biting her lip, Lapis shyly lifted her dress up until she was visible, lips puffy with arousal, swollen clit peeking out, the apex of her thighs shining with wetness. The hand not holding her dress up dipped in between her legs to rub a couple times, making her elicit a little gasp as she touched her sensitive clit, then pulled back to show Peridot. Her first two fingers were soaked, wetness webbing between her digits as she spread them a bit.

Unable to help herself, Peridot reached out to grab Lapis’s wrist and pull it closer, tongue darting out to taste the juices. She wrapped her lips around those fingers, sucking and licking them clean. By the time she pulled back, Lapis was panting with desire, eyes half lidded. A quick tug at the tie behind her neck and a little shimmy had her dress pooling at her feet and then Lapis was perfectly naked.

“Fuck me.” She begged, voice stoking the inferno currently burning low down in Peridot’s belly. 

Peridot leaned forward and grabbed Lapis around the waist, tugging her closer until she was crawling up to straddle Peridot’s waist. There was a momentary pause to line up the toy and then Lapis was sinking down with a moan. They started off slow, getting used to the rhythm and making sure that it was wet enough that it wouldn’t hurt. Peridot thrust up and Lapis ground down to meet her, the noisy sounds of their activities quickly filling the air.

It had been a while since they’d done this, between all the parental turmoil, neither had felt up to the task. As such, both were incredibly sensitive; Lapis could already feel her first orgasm getting close and Peridot was moaning uncontrollably at the way each motion rubbed the toy against her clit. 

Managing to tear one hand away from her lover’s exquisite body, Peridot reached down and thumbed a switch attached to the side of the harness. The toy sprang to life, vibrating wildly inside them both and sending their voices higher with the pleasure. Peridot reached between them and slid her hand down so she could touch Lapis’s clit, barely able to move with how close they were pressed together. It was enough, however, as that, coupled with Peridot sinking her teeth into the top of Lapis’s breast, sent the girl crying out with orgasm.

Lapis dragged her nails down Peridot’s shoulders, hips falling out of their rhythm as she throbbed wildly around the toy inside her. Peridot whined and kept thrusting up, a pleasurable tingling radiating out from the scratches and making her nipples tighten in near painful arousal. She loved this, loved fucking Lapis and pleasing her and could never get enough of being connected to her so intimately. 

“Let’s cum together.” She begged, holding Lapis to her tightly and pistoning into her hard and fast, “I’m getting close.”

“Bite me again!” Lapis cried out, struggling to keep up with the new pace Peridot had set. Her legs were still trembling and it was difficult to lift herself up. She moved her hands farther down Peridots back, digging her nails in just under her ribs. That was more than enough encouragement for Peridot, who obliged by leaning up and working her teeth into the sensitive skin of Lapis’s throat.

It was a place she’d never dared to bite before because it was so visible, but it was also one of Lapis’s biggest erogenous zones. Lapis shrieked at a surprising volume, caught completely off guard as her second orgasm washed over her with an unexpected intensity. Her eyes rolled in her head, nails raking more harshly than normal up Peridot’s back. The pain instantly sent the smaller girl over her own edge and she called out Lapis’s name in a breathless squeak, body trembling and shuddering in pleasure.

The toy was switched off quickly and both girls slumped together, catching their breaths. Then Peridot’s eyes popped open and she gaped at Lapis in awe, “You were so loud.” She breathed out.

Lapis blushed, biting her lip and refusing to look at her wife, “I wasn’t expecting you to bite me there!”

“I didn’t know you’d do that! I think you squirted on me, my lap is soaked!” Now Peridot was laughing, peering down between them in amazement.

“Ohhh my god, Peri, don’t say that!” Using one hand to hide her face, Lapis brought the other down on Peridot’s shoulder in a gentle smack.

“What? It’s so hot! I’ve only made you do that a couple times before, I’m definitely filing that away for later use.” They shifted a bit so Peridot could slip the toy off and drop it to the ground carelessly.

Lapis settled sideways in her wife’s lap, tucking her head against her shoulder. Peridot wrapped her arms around her and they cuddled in the aftermath of an emotionally and physically draining day. They hadn’t brought any of their aftercare supplies inside, which was a shame because they could definitely use a clean wipe and Peridot was fairly certain she was bleeding profusely.

Just cuddling would be fine for now, though.

“So, feeling vindicated?” Peridot asked softly against the top of Lapis’s head.

“Yeah, I think this helped.” Lapis replied, just as quiet. Then she paused a beat and said, “But I’m uncomfortably sticky and we need to go before I fall asleep and some unsuspecting churchgoer finds us like this.”

__________

Living in Peridot's car really wasn't so bad, all things considered. They stayed on the far side of the school parking lot and came in early to use the school's showers. The seats reclined and the battery charged their phones, even when the car was off. They couldn't cuddle much, but they did fall asleep holding hands more often than not. They could keep this up until graduation, but the two weeks until they could move into their apartment was uncertain.

Their luck couldn't hold forever, however, and two weeks before the end of school, both girls were awoken to a firm knocking on the passenger side window. A blinding light shown through the glass, an authoritative voice booming at them, even through the material.

“Hey! You two, you can't be here!” Peridot jerked upright and Lapis wrapped her arms around herself tightly. “Get out of the vehicle!”

Reaching over to give Lapis's hand a reassuring squeeze, Peridot complied. Lapis hesitated, not wanting to get out so close to a stranger, especially law enforcement. She waited until he stepped back, then gingerly followed suit.

She was relieved when Peridot quickly came to her side and took her hand to offer comfort. They both winced and shielded their eyes when the officer shined his flashlight in their faces.

“What're you two doing here?” The man demanded, intimidation attempt clear in the threatening way he leaned towards them. 

“Sleeping, officer, we have school tomorrow.” Peridot offered, taking a small step in front of her wife.

“And why aren't you two at home?” He demanded, “Are you runaways? Do you have identification?”

“We're not runaways, our parents kicked us out. And our id's are in the car.” Lapis was content to let Peridot do the talking, still feeling on edge in front of the man.

“Get them and your registration.” The officer demanded. Peridot gently tugged Lapis out of the way of the car door and pulled it open to rummage around inside.

Lapis pressed her back against the car and warily eyed the officer as he shined his light nosily over Peridot's shoulder, peering into the window. After a long few moments, Peridot finally straightened, holding two cards and a folded up paper in her hand. 

The cop grabbed them with a snatch that made Lapis feel indignant. He took them back to his patrol car, sitting silent in the dark behind them and giving off major creep vibes, leaving the two girls alone. Immediately, Peridot wrapped her arms around Lapis's shoulders.

“We're gonna be okay.” She murmured and Lapis wasn't certain who she was trying to reassure. She could feel Peridot trembling.

“I know, but it's still scary.” Lapis gripped the back of her shirt firmly. They held each other while waiting for the officer to come back; it seemed to take forever.

Eventually, he did return, interrupting a nearly dozing Peridot as she leaned into the crook of Lapis's neck. “Here.” He said, voice much less belligerent.

Peridot rubbed her eyes and yawned as she stood up straight, taking their id’s back from the cop. “What are you going to do with us, officer?” She asked quietly.

“Do you have anywhere else you can go? You can’t stay on this property after hours, even if you are students.” He still seemed grumpy, but much less so after checking out their clean records.

Peridot gave a sigh and exchanged a glance with Lapis, “Yes, I think we might have a place we can go.”

________________

 

When Rose Quartz opened her front door at a quarter after two in the morning, she wasn't sure what she was expecting. Certainly not two of Steven's high school friends standing on her porch with hopeful smiles and duffel bags.

“Hi, Mrs Quartz.” Said the smaller girl in a nasally voice, pitched higher than normal with anxiety. Peridot was her name, Rose remembered, even though they'd only been introduced once a couple years ago. “Sorry for waking you up.”

“That's alright.” And it really was, Rose was more concerned than annoyed. “What's going on?”

“Well, you see.” Nervousness rolled off the girl in waves as she shifted from foot to foot, “Lapis and I need a place to stay.”

Had she been more alert, Rose might have been able to guess as much. As it was, she had to pause and give them a once over to confirm their seriousness.

The girls looked up at her with shamed and pleading expressions. They obviously did not like that they had to ask for help and her heart went out to them. 

Stepping aside, Rose ushered them into the living room. “Would you two like anything to drink?” She asked, remembering her manners. After both girls had declined, she gestured for them to sit on the couch, “What happened?”

She watched them exchange a look, an unspoken conversation passing between them with ease. It seemed they agreed that Peridot would do the talking because the other girl, Lapis, remained quiet.

“We got forcefully evicted from our previous living arrangements.” Peridot revealed in a careful tone, both answering Rose's question and leaving her with more.

Curiosity tugging at her, Rose opened her mouth to press for details, but paused at the look sent her way. It was late, everyone was tired, maybe they simply didn't want to talk about it. Either way, Rose decided to hold of questions for now and just agree. 

She certainly wasn't going to turn them away.

“We have a guest room and the couch is a pull out.” She offered, watching relief spread over both girls and relaxing all their tense muscles.

“Thank you, Mrs Quartz. We'll take the guest room, if you don't mind.” Peridot answered immediately.

Rose blinked, looking back and forth between them. She noticed their posture, defensive but comforting the other, how they sat practically right against each other. The silent conversation from earlier. Most telling were the matching rings she could see visible on their left hands.

A few puzzle pieces fell into place quite suddenly.

“I don't mind at all, girls. Any friends of Steven's are welcome in my home.” She smiled at them, “Any time they need to be.” She insisted gently.

____________

Rose Quartz should be nominated as a candidate for sainthood, Peridot decided as she awoke to the smell of breakfast. She was still comfortably spooned against Lapis's back, face pressed between her wife's shoulder blades, but even the familiar scent of cheap soap on soft skin couldn't compete with precious bacon. Groggily, Peridot shook Lapis, trying to get her moving.

“Mmmey, ey, hey. Butt. Buttface. Woman. Babe, darling, honey pie. Lapis. Lapis. La-pis.” Each shake was punctuated by increasingly louder calls until, finally, her beautiful wife let out an aggravated zombie groan.

“Mmmmmmnnnnngggggg.” Lapis pulled the blankets up over her head and curled up into a tight ball.

Not at all deterred, Peridot half sat up, putting more effort into her shaking, “Come on, we still have school today. Plus, I'm hungry.”

“Mmu’re always hungry.” Lapis complained, peeking out of her cocoon with one blue eye. 

“Yeah, three times a day, even. Let's go, we need to get ready.” Still, Lapis's resisted her wife's insistent movements.

“Let's skip and sleep in.” Lapis went to go bury her face again, but an affronted gasp made her pause and look back up.

Peridot was clutching her hands to her chest in a most dramatic fashion. “How dare? I'm not a delinquent like you apparently are.”

Cackling, Lapis finally pushed the blankets down and rolled onto her back, “Really? You? Not a delinquent? Miss Lockpick herself?”

“Hey, I had a perfectly reasonable excuse for learning how to do that.” Peridot shifted all the way up, sitting cross legged beside her wife. Lapis draped an arm over her lap so they could sit as close as possible. “I don't have that for skipping school. I've not missed a day all year without a good reason.”

“You literally used that skill to do B and E's all year long for me.” 

Peridot sputtered, “Yes, but that was for you. I,” she gestured to herself dramatically, “Am a good girl.”

“Good girl in the streets, bad girl in the sheets.” Lapis quipped, watching a flush spread across Peridot's cheeks in what was only half embarrassment. “Why did you ever pick that up in the first place? I never thought to ask, I was always too busy drooling over you when you did it.”

“Oh, well…” Now Peridot looked sheepish, “I locked myself out of the house for an entire week once in middle school. When I finally managed to cobble together enough money to call the locksmith, I swore I'd never let it happen again.”

Lapis winced, “Yikes, why didn't you call your mother? Or use a hide-a-key?”

“Mo-That woman,” Peridot has been trying to get away from associating that word with her DNA donor, “was the first person I called. She said I'd either find a way in or have to wait until she came home the next month. She said I better not break anything I couldn't replace, either, and she forbid the use of hidden keys because it was, and I quote, ‘a security concern’.”

Lapis shook her head, “I'm gonna punch that bitch the next time I see her.”

“Hopefully you never have to.”

Silence fell between for a moment, Peridot frowning sadly at the thought of her parent. Lapis, unable to stand that look, reached up to cup her wife's cheek, “Hey. I love you.”

A smile bloomed on Peridot's face, the dark clouds clearing in an instant. She leaned down until her lips hovered just above Lapis's, “I love you, too.” She murmured, pressing forward to close the gap.

At the same moment, the door burst open with enthusiasm and Steven bounced inside, “Good morning!” 

The girls jerked, Lapis trying to sit up faster than Peridot could react. As a result, her forehead crashed into Peridot's nose, eliciting a cry of pain from the smaller girl. Lapis immediately tried to tend to her wife as she pawed frantically at her pained nose, Peridot checking for blood and Lapis for bruising.

Steven watched all this unfold with a wince, “Ouch, sorry guys. I didn't mean to scare y-wait.” Once it was clear there was no lasting damage, both girls looked up at him, “Were you two kissing~?”

Lapis rolled her eyes, but the flush on her cheeks was unmistakable, “Steven, we're married.”

“Awwwww!” He cried, clutching his hands together under his chin, “You like each other.”

“Oh my god.” Lapis mumbled, rolling so she could bury her face against Peridot's arm.

Peridot was laughing, but decided to take pity on her embarrassed wife. “Was there a reason you decided to barge into our room this morning, Steven?”

“Oh yeah!” He cried out brightly, “Mom wanted me to call you guys to breakfast.”

“I knew I smelled something delicious! Come on Lapis, you can't say no to both of us.” Peridot insisted, crawling over her wife unnecessarily to get out of bed in the far side. Lapis groaned and complained when Peridot pressed down with her full weight.

“Alright, you devil woman, I'm up.” Lapis said, sitting up to cheers from both Peridot and Steven. “But I need coffee!”

Peridot grabbed Lapis's hand and tugged her towards the door, where Steven joined them, grabbing Lapis's other hand so she wouldn't escape. Despite the grumbling, Lapis couldn't stop the smile from pulling her lips up.

They came into the main area of the house, a huge, open, studio style design with seating set up around the kitchen island. Plates full of food were already set out and Rose and her husband Greg were sitting down, chatting quietly.

They looked up at the newcomers and greetings were passed around. “How did you two sleep?” Rose asked once everyone was settled and caffeinated.

“Great! The bed was really comfy.” Peridot exclaimed, digging into her bacon with gusto, “I'd forgotten how good it felt to be able to stretch out.”

Rose and Greg exchanged a look, “How long had you two been… evicted? I think was the word you used?” Rose prodded gently.

Peridot shrugged, a bit uncomfortable with revealing their situation, “Few weeks.”

“Where were you staying before coming here?” Still, Rose pressed. 

Peridot had to look away from her gentle, knowing gaze, “In my car.”

Things fell silent; Peridot registered everyone's gaze on her. Lapis took her hand under the counter.

Finally, Steven spoke up, “Well, you don't have to worry anymore, you can stay with us! Right mom?” He looked to Rose, who smiled gently and agreed.

“Thank you. We won't be in your hair for very long, Lapis and I have an apartment waiting for us to move into the first of July.” With less than four weeks to go until then, confirmations were falling into place. 

They had officially signed the lease just a few days ago, which had been a struggle with the distance and internet access. Luckily, their realtor had been extremely understanding and that healthy safety deposit had helped, too.

“Hey, if you guys need help moving…” Greg trailed off, gesturing to himself in an obvious offer of help.

At first, Peridot wanted to say no, her pride not wanting her to accept help from someone she barely knew. Then a thought occurred to her, “Actually, I think I might need some help.” Here she turned to Lapis, “I hadn't really mentioned it yet, but I want to get my things back from my mo- my DNA donor's house.”

“I thought she had a monster security system?” Lapis raised an eyebrow, encouraging her to continue.

“She does, but I'm determined and vindictive. Also, I found out where her dogs are watching from and intercepted their signal. I can see everything they see and remotely take control at a moment’s notice.” Peridot grinned dangerously, showing off sharp incisors.

Lapis gave her a wide eyed look, then started to laugh, a breathless thing, full of disbelief. “Wow, Per, you really are amazing.”

Beaming at her wife's praise, Peridot continued, “I have this plan, see? What I'll do is wait until the day we're leaving, then freeze the signal. I'll print out a screenshot of my room the way it is with everything in it, then hook it up to the camera so that even when the signal comes back, it'll look like everything is still there. Then, we'll take all my furniture out and load it in a truck and escape!”

Steven cheered, Lapis clapped, Rose and Greg exchanged a worried look, “Is that legal?” He asked hesitantly.

“Probably not entirely, but I'm also sure it's not entirely legal to film people constantly without their knowledge, so…” Peridot shrugged carelessly.

Greg winced, “Yeah, that’s fair, but what happens when she finds out you took that stuff?”

“Most of it is mine anyway, stuff I purchased with my own money over the years. I think the bed and frame are hers, as well as the dresser, but the couch, tv, game consoles, computer stand? All mine. We can get a new bed, new dresser, I’m already thinking about things I want.” Lapis nodded along with Peridot’s words, indicating that they were both in agreement.

“We have more than just one room to furnish, too.” Pushing her empty plate away, Lapis nodded gratefully at Rose when it was picked up and set in the sink.

“Where are you moving to?” Rose asked, beginning to wash the dishes. Greg was quick to get up and come around to shoo her away and take her place at the sink. She decided to lean on the counter instead.

“We’re going to a college a couple hours southwest from here. We looked at apartments in the city.” Lapis supplied, “We made a couple friends already, so we might be able to tempt them into helping us move in, too.”

Lapis, who didn't normally warm up to strangers this quickly, found it easy to talk to the easy going couple. Rose asked her about the college they chose and Lapis found herself gushing about the art program and how good Peridot said the engineering courses were, and the campus and surrounding city.

Before she knew it, Peridot was tugging her back to their room, “Come on, we have to get ready for school, I wasn't kidding about going.”

“They're really nice.” Lapis noted as the door was shut behind them and they scrambled to pull their clean clothes out. She'd talked much longer than she'd intended.

“They are.” Peridot agreed, tugging her shirt over her head and making her hair puff out in all directions. Lapis laughed and went over to help her try to tame her wild locks, “It feels kinda nice to talk to a trustworthy adult for once.”

“You think this is kinda like what having a functioning family is like?” The question was posed casually, but Peridot recognized the guarded tone in her wife's voice.

The room fell silent as they both contemplated the idea. Finally, as they both stood at the door, dressed and ready to go, Peridot spoke up, “I don't know. All I know is that it's probably not too late to find out. Steven is a good kid, we could come back and visit him sometime.” And visit Rose and Greg.

Beaming, Lapis leaned down to peck Peridot on the forehead, “I think that sounds like a brilliant plan, love.”

It was hard for them to accept outside help, but maybe, just maybe, this was a good thing.

_____________

The last days of school came and went with a pleasant, new routine in the Universe household. Rose and Greg treated the two like they were a part of the family, something that Peridot embraced wholeheartedly and Lapis fell into with surprising speed. It was unlike her to trust, but the whole family made it easy.

School was just as good as home was, excitement for the end of it only grew stronger the farther up the food chain the students went. Seniors had it easy after the frantic studying and preparing that had come in the months before. Peridot even joined Lapis during senior prank day and senior skip day, which just so happened to fall right next to each other.

For this year's prank, the senior class filled balloons with chalk dust and threw them around the two major stairwells, dyeing everything in bursts of pastel colors. Easy enough to clean, fun enough to satisfy a bunch of teenagers’ chaotic needs. 

After an afternoon of socially acceptable vandalism, the two spent the next day on an all day date, taking in the sights of Beach City for their final time as high school students. It was a truly lovely way of ending things, both agreed later that night, nestled snugly in each other's arms.

School ended with little fanfare, but that was okay, the two had plans to shake things up at graduation. One week after the last day of school was the actual ceremony. 

They'd decided to stop hiding.

________

“Isn’t your last name Diamond?” Turning her head, Peridot regarded her classmate as they all sat in the auditorium, feeling like she should be able to remember the girl’s name, but drawing a blank. She could deduce that her last name began with an ‘L’, considering the section they were seated in, but no more information was forthcoming.

“My mom kind of disowned me.” Peridot revealed, “Now I have a new last name.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” The girl (was it Erin or maybe Becky?) said, face contrite. “Did you get adopted or something?”

“Or something. Don’t worry, you’ll see soon enough.” Glancing to her left, Peridot took in Lapis in all her be-robed glory, a braided cord around her shoulders indicating her graduation with honors. Peridot was proud of her and proud of herself and just so proud of everything right now. They had worked so hard to get to this point, all the sweat and tears and heartache accumulating into this momentous occasion that honored their journey into adulthood.

Lapis was chatting with her neighbor and didn’t notice Peridot’s gaze, so she took advantage of that to just look at her wife. After a lot of contemplation, Lapis had dyed her hair back to black for this day and it shone under the harsh lights, looking achingly soft. A light dusting of make-up adorned her face, her eyes sporting her signature thin winged liner that brought out the deep blue of her eyes. The bright blue robes they were in really did nothing to flatter their forms, but somehow Lapis made even that look good.

Sighing, Peridot reached out to bunch her fingers in the silky material hanging at Lapis’s side, not confident enough to actually hold her hand. Still in mid conversation, Lapis looked over to smile and tug Peridot’s fingers from her robe. With the utmost care, she twined their hands together and brought them to set against the top of her leg.

Peridot flushed and glanced around, but no one was paying them any mind. Gosh, they could really do this, they could really be open about themselves now. No one could stop them.

The thought brought her immeasurable joy.

All too soon and not soon enough, the actual ceremony started. Each row was seated alphabetically by last name and would be called up to accept their diplomas in that order. Peridot’s placing was a last minute change, considering her new last name had only been accepted by the school a few weeks before graduation. They’d gotten some flak for it, but in the end, it was all legal and the faculty had to abide. 

The thought made her more than a little smug.

Glancing around the auditorium, Peridot tried to spot her friends; Garnet was a few rows ahead, but both Pearl and Amethyst were behind; Amethyst caught her eye and waved energetically , a bright smile on her face. Peridot grinned and waved back, then turned her attention to the audience. With a lack of blood relatives to invite, Lapis and Peridot had given tickets to the Universe family. Peridot caught sight of Rose’s distinctive hair and felt a warmth fill her chest; it was good to know they had support behind them.

A part of her still yearned to see her mother’s familiar face and she hated herself for it. She turned back around and forced herself to focus on the stage, taking a deep breath to ward away the ache in her chest. A squeeze to her hand made her turn to her left, seeing Lapis’s concerned gaze.

“You okay?” She whispered gently, leaning her head closer so that no one would overhear.

Glancing down at their intertwined hands, Peridot caught sight of her own wedding band and the lapis lazuli stone embedded there. The promise of that ring, Lapis’s promise to her, helped to soothe the hurt left behind by her DNA donor. She smiled, giving Lapis’s hand a return squeeze, “Better now.”

They turned back to the ceremony, watching Garnet take the stage and cheering accordingly, the students moving across in a slow and steady stream. Before they knew it, the teacher was ushering their row up and in the line and they had to stop holding hands. Peridot fiddled with the cord around her neck, the one that signified highest honors that she was so proud of. Now all she could think of was all the eyes watching her and what she and Lapis were about to do.

“Lapis Lazuli.” The voice boomed into the microphone and Peridot snapped her head up to watch her wife cross the stage. She couldn’t help the smile that stretched her lips or the cheering whistle that she blew to show her support. It was easier to ignore everyone’s looks when she only had eyes for Lapis.

“Peridot Lazuli.” She nearly missed her own name being called, so focused was she on her wife. Luckily, she snapped back to attention in enough time to start walking across the stage.

There was an audible murmur rippling through the auditorium at the revelation of her new last name, but Peridot knew that if she looked around, she’d lose her nerve and probably trip over her own feet. She locked her eyes on the principal, marching towards him with determination, taking his hand in a mechanical shaking motion. Her diploma was thrust into her hands and she moved around to make her way off stage and pose for a quick picture.

She wasn’t expecting arms to wrap around her shoulders and she looked up in shock. Lapis had waited for her to come down!

“Hey, can you take our picture together?” Lapis asked the photographer, who looked like she wanted to refuse.

“Sure, just hurry up.” She said instead, not wanting to drag things out arguing.

“Smile, Peri.” Lapis encouraged sweetly when she realized her wife was still looking up at her in shock.

Peridot found it all too easy to grin, wrap her arm around Lapis waist, and pose for the camera. “I definitely want a print of this.”

 

_________________________

After the ceremony, the class had an unofficial gathering at a local venue for an after party. It was tradition for the students to all chip in and rent out the location, which included catering, and go to have fun with their friends for the last time of their high school careers. Lapis and Peridot were the subjects of the hour, their stunt having set off rumors like a landmine. As soon as they entered the venue, the Universe family behind them, they were swarmed with questions. 

Overwhelmed, Peridot reacted with vigor, “Back off, you clods!” She cried, jumping up and down and waving her arms wildly. Her classmates scattered, too afraid that she’d smack them with her energetic motions.

Lapis had a much different reaction. She simply ignored the questions and walked away, shoving through the other students if they weren’t fast enough to get out of the way.

The crowd was quick to split them up and, though they weren’t swarmed again, the other graduates still couldn’t help coming up to question them. 

“Did the Lazuli family adopt you?”

“Was there a mistake of some sort?”

“Did you two know that was going to happen?”

Peridot felt like her head was going to explode, but she wasn’t sure if it was going to be more from exasperation or the constant barrage. She’d tried looking around for Lapis, but the crowd and her height prevented her from actually being able to see anything. It was a shock when Lapis found her first, slipping an arm around her waist as she came in from seemingly out of nowhere.

“Hey.” She greeted after making Peridot jump nearly a foot in the air.

“Lapis! You clod, are you trying to give me heart failure?” Peridot grumbled, leaning into the touch anyway.

“Not you, but how about we put on a show before we blow this popsicle stand?” There was a mischievous look in her eyes that Peridot couldn’t help grinning at.

“You have a plan.” Of course she did, Lapis never talked like that unless she did.

“Just trust me and follow my lead.” Lapis tugged her over to a nearby buffet table and began to clear a space, moving trays of drinks to one side or the other. Peridot scrambled to help her and then pulled up a chair when she caught onto Lapis’s idea. Carefully, Lapis climbed up onto the table and helped Peridot up next to her. By now, a few people had noticed what they were doing and stopped to watch, but most of the rest were unaware of the spectacle to come.

“HEY FUCKOS!” Lapis cried, voice booming throughout the room. Once things had quieted and she was sure all eyes were on them, she continued, “She took my last name because she’s my wife!” 

Peridot squeaked when Lapis grabbed her around the waist and back and dipped her into a passionate kiss. There was stunned silence in the venue for what seemed like an eternity before scattered applause began to break out, quickly turning into raucous cheering. Lapis chuckled against Peridot’s lips, pulling away just enough so that she could comfortably look into her eyes.

“Ready to go?” Peridot asked with a smile.

“Yeah, I think I made my point.” Lapis laughed and they carefully climbed off of the table. They had to muscle their way through the crowds, but Lapis was more than happy to put a little elbow into getting free. As they walked out the doors hand in hand, excited crowd behind them, Lapis lifted her arm into the air and flipped everyone the bird.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Epilogue: How Did It End Up Like This?

The apartment was noisy, filled with the excited chatter of accomplished young adults after a hard day of manual labor. Pizza was being passed around, cups were filled with soda, and the newly arranged furniture was getting a work out. 

Peridot, ever the excitable hostess, was flitting about and making sure everyone had whatever they needed. She set napkins on the coffee table and finally flopped down on the couch next to Lapis, who’s hair was back to its usual electric blue. They had bribed the college students they’d met a few months ago with food and games to come over and help them move into their apartment. 

Currently, John, the heavy set blonde boy, was setting up Peridot’s game station, sitting on the floor in the middle of a tangle of wires while the other three lazed about on the plush rug around him. The plan was for the group to take turns playing a four player free for all brawling game and relax after the long day. They’d managed to move the entire Uhaul full of smuggled furniture into the apartment in the course of a single morning. The boxes were also in, but would have to wait for a proper unpacking. There was plenty of time for that later.

Lapis, feeling the warmth of contentment filling her chest, leaned against Peridot’s side. Her wife reached out without hesitation and took her hand, a pleased hum escaping involuntarily. Lapis felt so good right now, it was almost unreal how happy she was, eating cheap pizza on their familiar couch in their own apartment.

A flash of light caught her eye as the game image filled the television screen, eliciting a cheer from their guests. Peridot laughed along with them as the game system was carefully set on the tv stand and controllers were passed around. “I call next!” She shouted playfully, “Loser has to give up their spot.”

A vibration from her back pocket drew Lapis’s attention away from the festivities and she reach back to pull out her phone. The name Rose Quartz-Universe flashed on the screen, accompanied by a selfie she’d taken with the older woman while they were leaving her graduation.

Smiling, Lapis stood, turning to look down at a curious Peridot, “It’s Rose, I’m gonna step into the bedroom and take this.”

“Okay, don’t take too long or I’m gonna come drag you back.” Peridot threatened with an impish grin.

“Oh, you promise?” Lapis teased back with a wink. 

By the TV, Lizzy gave a wolf whistle, “Will we get a show?” She laughed, making Lapis and Peridot both flush, before she cursed and focused back on the screen while frantically mashing buttons.

Lapis took the chance to escape, lifting the phone to her ear as she turned the corner, “Hey Rose.” She greeted warmly.

“Hello dear.” Rose greeted just as warmly, “I just wanted to check up on you two, since I wasn't able to help lately.”

“Oh yeah, how's your mother doing? How's Empire City?” Lapis asked, surprising herself with how little of the query was just to be polite.

“My mother is fine, just a little fall. She's made of tougher stuff, but I'll still be up here taking care of her for a little while longer. The city is just as noisy as ever, but it holds a certain charm.”Rose gave a great sigh, “I think you and my mother would probably get along famously.”

Lapsi chuckled, “Why? Is she also a sarcastic little shit?”

“Very much so.” Rose said dryly, “My father, rest his soul, was always more mellow.”

Now laughing outright, Lapis said in a sing song, “It’s not family if they don’t drive you crazy~”

She could practically hear Rose rolling her eyes, “I suppose that is a hallmark. So! Tell me about the move and Peridot’s plan.” 

“My girl is brilliant.” Lapis gushed, “The whole plan went off without a hitch. Turns out, her DNA donor had set up her security team in the house behind her, the cameras were all being wirelessly monitored and Peridot traced the signal with some gadget she threw together with spare parts.” Lapis let out a little lovesick sigh, impressed as she always was with her wife’s intellect.

Rose giggled at her, “You’re in love~” She teased, sounding so much like Steven in that moment that Lapis could only laugh with her.

“I really am, but that doesn’t take away from Peri’s big brain. She wrote this program to hack into the signal and take over the cameras and freeze them until we could get in and take everything we wanted. We’d rented out a truck for the day and collected as many of our friends as we could so we could get it done quick fast and in a hurry. Once the cameras were taken care of, Peri picked the lock; oh Rose,” Lapis swooned, “She was so cool.”

That sent Rose into another giggle fit. Lapis knew she was being dramatic, but she just couldn’t help it. Once Rose had calmed again, she said, “You sound happy.”

“I am happy.” Lapis admitted easily, “I’ve never felt like this before, so free and warm. A part of me worries when it will end, but a bigger part just wants to enjoy it while it’s here.” There was a pause, then Lapis continued, “Um, I set up a doctor’s appointment for Friday to talk about getting help. For, uh, my brain and stuff. Peri did, too. We agreed that it would be best to try and see different doctors.”

“I think that’s a wonderful idea and I’m proud of you for trying to get help.” Rose said and Lapis had to blink back sudden tears.

“Ah, Rose…” Lapis said, trailing off and hoping that Rose understood.

They fell into a warm silence for a few moments, before Rose broke it by saying, “Actually, I have some news of my own that I thought might interest you.”

“Oh?” Lapis prodded encouragingly.

“I have a friend that works in a big law firm and she came to me with some information about how a certain Ms. Diamond came in to try and find someone to enact charges against her daughter, only to have things turned around on her when it was discovered just what lengths she went to with surveillance and neglect. I would expect for some policemen to be in contact with Peridot fairly soon as they investigate Ms. Diamond for these things.”

Lapis felt a cold hand grip her heart, glancing towards the living room and her wife, “I’ll let Peri know.” She paused, then, “Have you heard anything about my parents?”

“Actually yes. That was my next bit of news; turns out that your father has been building churches with substandard products on purpose so that he could make a higher profit. A church he recently renovated collapsed in the middle of the night. Luckily no one was hurt, but it opened up an investigation by the Better Business Bureau and what they’re finding isn’t flattering.”

Lapis felt… Something. Vindication? Guilt at that? Confused, certainly, it was hard to sort out at the moment, so she pushed her swirling thoughts away and promised to unpack that later. “Well, it couldn’t have happened to nicer people.” She said as neutrally as she could, which wasn’t really at all possible, so it came out more bitter than intended. “Guess I know what I’ll be talking about with my shrink, huh?”

“Lapis…” Rose started, but Lapis was quick to cut her off.

“I’ll be okay, don’t worry about me. I’ll tell Peri and we can deal with things together. Then talk to a professional later. We’ve got a good plan now.”

“What’s a good plan?” Peridot spoke up from behind and Lapis jumped, not having heard the door open.

Smiling warmly at her wife, Lapis reached out to pull her into an embrace, “Therapy.”

Peridot laughed, because it was true but Lapis's delivery still made it sound like a joke. “Hi, Rose!” She called, resting her chin on Lapis's collar bone and tilting her ear closer to the phone.

“Hello, Peridot!” Rose answered, voice tiny through the speakers for them both as Lapis fumbled with the speaker option, then, suddenly, she was much louder, “How's the move been?”

“Pretty smooth so far. We commandeered our new friends to help with the heavy lifting and we decided we'll get to a few boxes per day until we're totally settled.” Leaning into Lapis, who stumbled under the extra weight but quickly adapted, Peridot allowed herself to relax. 

Lapis chuckled and wrapped her arm around Peridot's waist, careful not to touch her back. “Peri is gonna be slave driver.” She grinned, Peridot huffing indignantly into the phone, “She's got the boxes scheduled to be opened on certain days and everything.”

Rose's laughter tinkles through the speakers and Peridot scrambled to explain herself, “Because some boxes contain necessities! That's all, I'm not weird, I'm organized!”

“Of course you are, dear.” Rose said, not elaborating on which Peridot was. Lapis laughed and Peridot whined about being ganged up on. “Well, I'll let you two go, I just wanted to touch base with you. Have fun with the rest of the move!”

They said their goodbyes and Lapis hung up, slipping the phone back into her pocket and using her now free hand to pull Peridot closer. Settling into a comfortable embrace, the two swayed slightly, enjoying the warmth and comfort the other exuded.

After a few moments of silence, Lapis cleared her throat, “Um, Rose did give me some news about our, uh, parents.” She broached gently.

She felt Peridot stiffen, then relax, asking almost too casually, “What about them?”

“My dad is in trouble with his business. He was doing some unsafe stuff while building in order to better profit.” Lapis started, hearing Peridot grumbling nonsensically into her chest.

“Dick.” She growled, squeezing Lapis tighter. There was a pause, “And mine?”

“Apparently tried to talk to a lawyer about you, except it backfired. Rose says some cops might be knocking soon, so, heads up.” Peridot's head pressed firmly against Lapis's sternum, to an almost painful degree. Lapis said nothing, content to let Peridot work out her feelings however she needed.

“Now I see why you were talking about therapy.” Peridot mumbled, tilting her head to the side.

“Yeeeeaup.” Lapis replied, popping the ‘p'.

They fell into silence, just holding each other, lost in thoughts. They were still young, Lapis considered, they had plenty of time to work through the feelings left behind by their neglectful parental units. They had each other, they could make it together; she stroked the top of Peridot's head, catching the light glinting off her wedding ring.

“Hey.” She murmured, waiting until Peridot looked up. Then Lapis leaned down and pressed her lips to Peridot's forehead, “I love you.”

Immediately, Peridot beamed, tilting her head and stretching up on her toes so that she could kiss Lapis on the lips. “I love you, too. We can do this. You know that, right? We can get through this together.”

A feeling of elation swept through Lapis as she realized that Peridot had been thinking the same thing. “I know we can.” She agreed firmly, “Because you make me this happy.”

Leaning down, Lapis kissed Peridot deeply, thing to convey as much of her emotion as she could in that moment. Peridot gave back just as eagerly, pushing up into Lapis's arms. They probably would have continued for some time if there hadn't come a loud knock at the door, startling them apart.

“Hey, no making out until we're all gone!” Came Lizzy's voice, carrying a teasing lilt, “Come out and play with us, you crazy kids.”

Lapis and Peridot exchanged a look and couldn't help but laugh. “We're coming, we're coming, keep your pants on!” Peridot called, taking Lapis's hand and leading her back to the living room. _‘Their living room.’_ Lapis thought and followed along with a smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact, the college I chose for them to go to is actually in my hometown. I fudged a bit about the programs so that they'd be happy going in together since, while it is known for Engineering, it's not exactly what Peri is going for and the art is more known for sculpting than painting, but whatever. It had been a long time since I'd driven downtown, too, so I originally had Peri and Lapis unimpressed with the state of the college area, but the last time I was there, I was surprised by the renovations that had been done! It actually looks really nice and accessible now, although traffic is still a bitch.
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading this little piece of mine! I think this is the first multi chaptered story I've finished since probably high school and, even if I'm not always pleased with it, I still feel accomplished. Thanks to everyone that commented and gave me kudos, I felt like the response was overwhelmingly positive, which made me feel a lot better about the things I wasn't happy with in the story and my writing.


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